Naz wrote:

My theory is that you just look at the women all day. Now you ask why 72. Well lets face it men get bored just looking at one woman so by having 72 when you get bored of No.1 you stare at No.2, when you get bored of No.2 you stare at No.3 and so on. When you finally get to No.72 you think to yourself hmmmm I kinda miss looking at No.1 so you go back to staring at No.1 again.

if its heaven, then surely then would be no such thing as boredom???

Naz wrote:

Firstly there is no such as a happily married couple (ive yet to come across one).

n u know that for a fact do u?
youve asked every single married couple whether theyre happy or not?

Naz wrote:

Hajjar wrote:

......and lets face it most women are very jealous when this "hur" topic is bought up.

:? They are?
What have they got to be jealous about?
The Quran clearly states that the pious ppl (men and women) that enter Jannat get Hur.
Plus jealously is from the shataan and it shows insecurity.

Jealousy is an excusable natural trait and is indicative of the love and care that one spouse has over another. It DOESN'T mean that it is from shaytan, and it DOESN't mean that you are insecure. :!: It is an acceptable and excusable feeling so long as you do not overstep the mark and say or do something haram or bad like throw hot coffee over the person you are jealous of. :shock:

In addition, it is a well known fact that some of the umm al-Mu'mineen were jealous of each other. For example, sayyidah A'isha bint Abu Bakr (radiAllahu anha) was jealous of the other wives of the Prophet (i.e. sayyidah Khadija bint Khawlayd (radiAllahu anha)). This wasn't bad or haram jealousy.

There are two types of jealousy: Hasad and Gheerah.

Hasad in arabic means that your jealousy has reached such proportions that you wish evil for another person and you have rancor in your heart for this person. This is destructive jealousy and is bad. This is what you may feel if your friend buys a new dress, you are jealous, and you wish her, and her dress harm :shock:

Gheerah in arabic means protectiveness or jealousy. It is considered a good quality. In fact, a man without Gheerah is not considered a man. :? This is what you may feel if a woman began becoming overly social with your husband. This is protective jealousy and is considered acceptable/excusable.

I thought there were only two situations that it is halal to be jealous:

1. If someone has a lot of money that they spend for the sake of Allah (swt) (i.e. not if they use it to live a life of luxury).

2. If someone knows a lot of the Qur'an and they can spend many hours of the night in prayer.

This is from a hadith.

On second thoughts, it might be that these are the two types of jealousy that are actually POSITIVE to have, rather than negative/neutral jealousy in other situations.

Unless you hope that this person burns in Hell.

1R4M wrote:

if its heaven, then surely then would be no such thing as boredom???

Hmmm suppose

1R4M wrote:

Naz wrote:

Firstly there is no such as a happily married couple (ive yet to come across one).

n u know that for a fact do u?
youve asked every single married couple whether theyre happy or not?

From the couples that i have observed yes i would say they are not happily married, far from it. And no i havent carried out a national survey to find out whether ppl are happily married or not.

Amal wrote:

Jealousy is an excusable natural trait and is indicative of the love and care that one spouse has over another. It DOESN'T mean that it is from shaytan, and it DOESN't mean that you are insecure.

Well what if your not the jealous type? In my opinion i find jealously as a sign of insecurity and it also shows a lack of trust one spouse has over another.

One thing i dont get is when a woman talks lovingly about Allah(swt) another women wont even bat an eye lid but if she sees her husband talking to another woman all hell breaks loose.

Naz wrote:

My theory is that you just look at the women all day. Now you ask why 72. Well lets face it men get bored just looking at one woman so by having 72 when you get bored of No.1 you stare at No.2, when you get bored of No.2 you stare at No.3 and so on. When you finally get to No.72 you think to yourself hmmmm I kinda miss looking at No.1 so you go back to staring at No.1 again.

That would never work. I get bored too easily.

Naz wrote:

From the couples that i have observed yes i would say they are not happily married, far from it. And no i havent carried out a national survey to find out whether ppl are happily married or not.

Relationships have their ups and downs. Theres bound to be stuff you disagree about. How boring would it be if you always agreed on everything? It doesnt mean that you're not happy.

Naz wrote:

Well what if your not the jealous type? In my opinion i find jealously as a sign of insecurity and it also shows a lack of trust one spouse has over another.

Jealousy is a natural response. It shows how much you care about someone else and makes you a little selfish. I dont really think its about trust... more so about obsessive love.

Seraphim wrote:

Naz wrote:

My theory is that you just look at the women all day. Now you ask why 72. Well lets face it men get bored just looking at one woman so by having 72 when you get bored of No.1 you stare at No.2, when you get bored of No.2 you stare at No.3 and so on. When you finally get to No.72 you think to yourself hmmmm I kinda miss looking at No.1 so you go back to staring at No.1 again.

That would never work. I get bored too easily.

Most guys would kill just to have one beautiful women and your telling me that 72 really beautiful women would bore you. :?

Seraphim wrote:

Naz wrote:

From the couples that i have observed yes i would say they are not happily married, far from it. And no i havent carried out a national survey to find out whether ppl are happily married or not.

Relationships have their ups and downs. Theres bound to be stuff you disagree about. How boring would it be if you always agreed on everything? It doesnt mean that you're not happy.

True true relationships do have their ups and down but the ppl i have observed its more then ups and down. Ive seen Muslims couples shopping in a supermarket and the husband will be wearing at the wife coz she had put something in the trolley. Ive seen husbands who walk 2 steps in front of their wife like they are ashamed or consider themselves superior. Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job). I once attended a chaand raat and there was a couple. The wife saw some clothes and asked her hubby to cough up. He was looking through his wallet for some money and his wife snatched it off him (no joke) took the money out paid the owner and kept the wallet lol. How can above examples be considered as happily married couples?

In regards to your spouse agreeing with everything your right it would be a very boring marriage. God imagine being married to a doormat id rather eat cheese and onion crisps!

i think u lot have wonderd from the original topic lol

Naz wrote:

Most guys would kill just to have one beautiful women and your telling me that 72 really beautiful women would bore you.

lol, im a complicated kinda guy. I always get bored sitting around doing nothing. I suppose i could go off exploring heaven and if they wanna come with then I wont stop them.

Naz wrote:

True true relationships do have their ups and down but the ppl i have observed its more then ups and down. Ive seen Muslims couples shopping in a supermarket and the husband will be wearing at the wife coz she had put something in the trolley. Ive seen husbands who walk 2 steps in front of their wife like they are ashamed or consider themselves superior. Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job). I once attended a chaand raat and there was a couple. The wife saw some clothes and asked her hubby to cough up. He was looking through his wallet for some money and his wife snatched it off him (no joke) took the money out paid the owner and kept the wallet lol. How can above examples be considered as happily married couples?

But then again, ive seen couples happily arm-in-arm shopping togeather. Where he doesnt really care what she puts in the trolly. Ive seen couples playfully take digs at each other for buying odd things. Ive seen couples who refuse to go anywhere without each other. And theres nothing wrong with the father taking the kids out.

You need to stop focusing on the bad and be a lil more positive. There are decent people out there, and there are some great couples too. You just need to stop being so grouchy and come into the 21st Century.

Oh and whats wrong with Cheese and Onion crisps?

Naz wrote:

True true relationships do have their ups and down but the ppl i have observed its more then ups and down. Ive seen Muslims couples shopping in a supermarket and the husband will be wearing at the wife coz she had put something in the trolley. Ive seen husbands who walk 2 steps in front of their wife like they are ashamed or consider themselves superior. Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job). I once attended a chaand raat and there was a couple. The wife saw some clothes and asked her hubby to cough up. He was looking through his wallet for some money and his wife snatched it off him (no joke) took the money out paid the owner and kept the wallet lol. How can above examples be considered as happily married couples?

right
so
basically
just because youve seen a few couple NOT happy that basically means that EVERY SINGLE married person is unhappy???
I take it that ur mainly observing Pakistani or other south asian couples
how representative

Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job).

SHOCK HORROR?!

If a woman ever made ME push the push chair arund, I'd be like "Hey! B****! Go to the kitchen and bake me a pie!"

anyway...

Some of my friends were complaining they weren't married, and an uncle said to them: "OK. Right now you are not married, so you have a problem. But once you get married, you'll have a thousand problems."

But problems DON'T equal unhappiness.

Naz can you stop please, I'm supposed to be asking someone's father in the next couple of days and you're putting me off!

Ya'qub wrote:

Naz can you stop please, I'm supposed to be asking someone's father in the next couple of days and you're putting me off!

Haven't you already done that? Anyway, good lu-! Sorry, Inshallah it'll be fine.

Ya'qub wrote:

Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job).

SHOCK HORROR?!

If a woman ever made ME push the push chair arund, I'd be like "Hey! B****! Go to the kitchen and bake me a pie!"

boy, am i glad im not married to you!

Sumaiya wrote:

boy, am i glad im not married to you!

Stop lying to yourself.

I was being sarcastic. but, whatever.

Ya'qub wrote:

Sumaiya wrote:

boy, am i glad im not married to you!

Stop lying to yourself.

you wish...

Sumaiya wrote:

Ya'qub wrote:

Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job).

SHOCK HORROR?!

If a woman ever made ME push the push chair arund, I'd be like "Hey! B****! Go to the kitchen and bake me a pie!"

boy, am i glad im not married to you!

Relax, its a line from South Park. Bro Ya'qub is not really like that.

Seraphim wrote:

Sumaiya wrote:

Ya'qub wrote:

Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job).

SHOCK HORROR?!

If a woman ever made ME push the push chair arund, I'd be like "Hey! B****! Go to the kitchen and bake me a pie!"

boy, am i glad im not married to you!

Relax, its a line from South Park. Bro Ya'qub is not really like that.

yeah, right

Seraphim wrote:

Naz wrote:

Most guys would kill just to have one beautiful women and your telling me that 72 really beautiful women would bore you.

lol, im a complicated kinda guy. I always get bored sitting around doing nothing. I suppose i could go off exploring heaven and if they wanna come with then I wont stop them.

there aint much to see in heaven expect for trees, flowers and rivers.

Seraphim wrote:

Naz wrote:

True true relationships do have their ups and down but the ppl i have observed its more then ups and down. Ive seen Muslims couples shopping in a supermarket and the husband will be wearing at the wife coz she had put something in the trolley. Ive seen husbands who walk 2 steps in front of their wife like they are ashamed or consider themselves superior. Ive seen men pushing push chairs with their kid in it (sorry im a bit old fashioned i dont think its very manly or appropriate for a man to be pushing the push chair while his wife is with him, its the womans job). I once attended a chaand raat and there was a couple. The wife saw some clothes and asked her hubby to cough up. He was looking through his wallet for some money and his wife snatched it off him (no joke) took the money out paid the owner and kept the wallet lol. How can above examples be considered as happily married couples?

But then again, ive seen couples happily arm-in-arm shopping togeather. Where he doesnt really care what she puts in the trolly. Ive seen couples playfully take digs at each other for buying odd things. Ive seen couples who refuse to go anywhere without each other. And theres nothing wrong with the father taking the kids out.

You need to stop focusing on the bad and be a lil more positive. There are decent people out there, and there are some great couples too. You just need to stop being so grouchy and come into the 21st Century.

Sorry ignore me Im having one of those weeks where Im negative about everything. Yeah your right there are decent ppl out there but it just takes one bad person to form a negative view of the rest.

Seraphim wrote:

Oh and whats wrong with Cheese and Onion crisps?

Whats right with them? They smell really bad and I cant eat stuff that smells. There was once upon a time when I did eat them but about 10 years ago I suddenly started to dislike them. Not touched a single packet of cheese and onion crisp since then. I cant even stand next to ppl who eat cheese and onion crisps coz the smell makes me wanna puke.

Yaqub wrote:

Naz can you stop please, I'm supposed to be asking someone's father in the next couple of days and you're putting me off!

Sorry my intentions are not to put you off just ignore me Im sure you will be a very caring and loving husband to your wife Are you nervous about asking? Have you got your little speech prepared? Thank God Im not a guy I dont think I could ever pluck up the courage to go an ask someones dad for their daughters hand in marriage.

Ya'qub wrote:

Naz can you stop please, I'm supposed to be asking someone's father in the next couple of days and you're putting me off!

god help her

Ya'qub wrote:

Naz can you stop please, I'm supposed to be asking someone's father in the next couple of days and you're putting me off!

Go for it bro, all the best.

Remember to play it cool.

Naz wrote:

Whats right with them? They smell really bad and I cant eat stuff that smells. There was once upon a time when I did eat them but about 10 years ago I suddenly started to dislike them. Not touched a single packet of cheese and onion crisp since then. I cant even stand next to ppl who eat cheese and onion crisps coz the smell makes me wanna puke.

You're weird. Cheese and Onions are quite nice... altho now that i think about it... i dont remember the last time i had them hmmm curious... anyway theres nothing wrong with them at all. You're just being over-sensative as usual.

Ya'qub wrote:

Naz can you stop please, I'm supposed to be asking someone's father in the next couple of days and you're putting me off!

about time, 22 and not married, im gonna get married at 19 inshallah

Naz wrote:

Seraphim wrote:

Oh and whats wrong with Cheese and Onion crisps?

Whats right with them? They smell really bad and I cant eat stuff that smells. There was once upon a time when I did eat them but about 10 years ago I suddenly started to dislike them. Not touched a single packet of cheese and onion crisp since then. I cant even stand next to ppl who eat cheese and onion crisps coz the smell makes me wanna puke.

Cheese and onion are pretty stinky, although I don't find them offensive to my nose. I wouldn't really eat them myself, but I don't really eat crisps unless they're really plain. I find them too salty.

The one flavour which I can't STAND is salt and vinegar. yyyyuuuuuccckkk. If someone is eating this one the bus I start to feel sick./ Its really horrible! Why would anyone want to put something so disgusting INSIDE THEIR OWN MOUTH?!?!

I'm a bit fussy about some food: S&V crisps, ketchup, orange juice, beetroot, coleslaw. I don't know which I hate the most. My nightmare is having to eat some of those things.

yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck.

love to live but living to die wrote:

Sumaiya wrote:

im gonna get married at 19 inshallah

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? 19!!?!

your not joking are you? :?

I mean >> WHY 19??

why not? and anyway i was thinking if i get married, then he could pay off my student bills inshallah.

good plan, eh?

the words using-him-to-my-advantage-coz-theyre-not-good-for-anything-else comes to my mind.

and again..............gold digger comes to mind !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ya'qub wrote:

Naz wrote:

Seraphim wrote:

Oh and whats wrong with Cheese and Onion crisps?

Whats right with them? They smell really bad and I cant eat stuff that smells. There was once upon a time when I did eat them but about 10 years ago I suddenly started to dislike them. Not touched a single packet of cheese and onion crisp since then. I cant even stand next to ppl who eat cheese and onion crisps coz the smell makes me wanna puke.

Cheese and onion are pretty stinky, although I don't find them offensive to my nose. I wouldn't really eat them myself, but I don't really eat crisps unless they're really plain. I find them too salty.

The one flavour which I can't STAND is salt and vinegar. yyyyuuuuuccckkk. If someone is eating this one the bus I start to feel sick./ Its really horrible! Why would anyone want to put something so disgusting INSIDE THEIR OWN MOUTH?!?!

I'm a bit fussy about some food: S&V crisps, ketchup, orange juice, beetroot, coleslaw. I don't know which I hate the most. My nightmare is having to eat some of those things.

yuck yuck yuck yuck yuck.

lol... thats intense bro. I dislike Salt and Vinegar crisps too... but i wouldnt go as far as saying its yuck. Its still food dude. I think at the moment i prefer either ready salted or sour cream pringles. Coz once you pop... you cant stop (damn it! I promised myself I wasnt gonna do that!! Just put the money on the table and get out... GET OUT I TELL YA!)

Orange Juice????? How on earth can you hate Orange juice? Okay i wont drink the one with floating bits in it, but other than that i like a glass of orange juice in the morning.

At the end of the day, its just food bro. Should be grateful for what you get and not do nakhre lol.

Sumaiya wrote:

love to live but living to die wrote:

Sumaiya wrote:

im gonna get married at 19 inshallah

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND? 19!!?!

your not joking are you? :?

I mean >> WHY 19??

why not? and anyway i was thinking if i get married, then he could pay off my student bills inshallah.

good plan, eh?

He'd had to be VERY stupid to do that. And yes, that is called being a Gold Digger... and they're usually incredibly good looking.

are you trying to say something?