I will treat you with affection, as far as I can,

and if you deal with me unkindly,

I cannot act unkindly in return.

If, like a parrot, your food be sugar,

I will devote my sweet life for your nourishment

the song below will make u laugh only if u know the beat/tune to the song "Baby got back"

I like long hijabs and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty pin
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung
Wanna pull out some hadith
Cuz you notice that hijab is stuffed
Deep in the jilbab she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, sistah, I wanna get with ya
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But with that scarf you got
Me so holly
Ooh, all of that smooth silk
You say you wanna get in my benz
Well use me use me cuz you aint that average hijabi
I've seen them other girls yapping
The heck with their jealousy
Let them sweat, coz hijabi got it going like a mullah in vette
I'm tired of magazines
Saying permed hair is the thing
Take the average muslim man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
Brothas (yeah) Brothas (yeah)
Has your sister got the scarf (heck yeah)
Well tie it, tie it, tie it, tie that long hijab
Baby got iman
I like'em round and big
And when I'm throwin a gig
I just can't help myself
I'm actin like a kafir
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And UH, double up UH UH
I'm talking about Macys
Cuz Tie Rack scarfs were'nt made with lacies
I wannem real thick and silky
So find that silky double
Mixalot's in trouble
Beggin for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at conferences
Knockin these girls just walkin for show
You can have them girls
I'll keep my sistaz away from "Moe"
A word to the thick soul sistas
I wanna get with ya
I won't cus or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna pray
Til the break of dawn (UH!)
I got it goin on
Alot of pimps won't like this song
Cuz them punks lie to hit it and quit it
But I'd rather stay and play
Cuz I'm long and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So sistahs (yeah), Sistahs (yeah)
If you wanna role in my Mercedes (yeah)
Then wrap it up
Stick it out
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got iman
Yeah baby
When it comes to females
Cosmo aint got nothin to do with my selection
24 by 24
Only if the scarf is creme
So your girlfriend throws a Honda
Playing workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda aint got motor in the back of her Honda
And I kinda don't want none unless you've got it pinned hun
You can pin it up left or right, but please dont lose that scarf
Some brothers wanna play that hard role
And tell you that the scarf aint gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So white boy says you're a Fob
Well I aint down with Bob
Cuz your hijabs r long and the patterns are kickin
And I'm thinkin bout stickin
To the beanpole dames in the magazines
You aint it miss thing
Give me a sista I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some redneck tried to dis
Cuz his girls were on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And pulled up quick to get with 'em
So ladies if the hijab is long
And you wanna way to be strong
Dial 1800-MIXALOT and think them halal thoughts

That is hilarious you joker.

I showed it to all my brothers and they cracked up big time.

Where'd you get it from?

That was a forwarded email…its very funny if you’re familiar with the song they based it on.

LOL

that was very cheeky, but funny....even tho i dont knw the song!

what song is it? (by whom)

Its called Baby got back.

Its a typical black hip hop song that talks about their favourite subject... Back-Thats puttin it politely seeing as this is an islamic forum.

I was going to post the original song lyrics but then decided against it.

Its by Sir Mix-A-Lot, so just check out the lyrics yourself if you're curious.

In [i]Friends [/i]Ross and Rachel sing it to Emily to make her laugh.

"irfghan" wrote:

In [i]Friends [/i]Ross and Rachel sing it to Emily to make her laugh.

yeh i watched that episode

is Fred a Friends fan?

btw guys [url=http://www.cse.unsw.edu.au/~geoffo/humour/flattery.html]THIS[/url] is an ego booster

I don't know. Who's Fred?

When Majnun was reproached by the people that why do u love Layla when she is no great beauty he replied:

Quote:

You can have no fellow-feeling for my disorder.

A companion to me must have the same sickness,

That I may sit by him all day, telling my tale;

For rubbing two pieces of dry firewood together

Will make them burn brighter.

Had that grove of verdant reeds heard the murmurs

Of love that pass through my ear in detail

Of my mistress's story, it would have

Sympathized with my pain.

Tell it, my friends, to those ignorant of love;

Would you could be aware of what wrings my soul!

The anguish of a wound is unknown to the healthy;

We must detail our aches only to a fellow-sufferer.

It were idle to talk of a hornet to him

Who has not yet smarted from its sting.

Till your condition is something like mine,

My state will seem like an idle fable.

Compare not my pain with that of another:

He holds salt in his hand,

I bear it on an open wound.”

Beautiful or what?

loll........

THE FUTURE PAKISTAN
This would become reality in 2007 subject to the condition that we have a new president

Year: 2007

Two Top American Executives at IBM, USA
Alex: Hi John. You didn't come to work yesterday
John: Yeah. I was at the Pakistani Embassy trying to get my visa.
Alex: Oh, really? What happened? I've heard that these days they have become very strict.
John: Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex: How long did it take to get it stamped?
John: Man, it was a long queue. Bill Gates was waiting in front of me and they really gave him a hard time. The poor guy even brought the property papers for his house in Seattle to show them that he will return to USA. I went there at 4:00 a.m. to get in the queue and there were tons of people ahead of me.
Alex: Really? In Pakistan, at the US Embassy it only takes an hour to get a visa for USA.
John: Yeah! But that's because no one in Pakistan would want to come to USA, except Americans who have taken Pakistani nationality and want to bring their kids here.
Alex: So, when are you leaving?
John: As soon as I get my tickets from the company in Pakistan. I'm &nb sp;so excited. I will be getting a chance to finally fly with the world's fastest growing airline, Pakistan International Airlines (PIA). Sort of dream come true, you know.
Alex: How long are you planning to stay in Pakistan?
John: What do you mean "how long"? I will try and settle in Pakistan. My company has promised me that they will process my Green Book as soon as possible.
Alex: Really? Man, you're a lucky one. It's very difficult to get the Green Book in Pakistan. Last year my cousin and his family went there on a tourist visa and they're not coming back now.
John: Yeah. That's why I'm planning on marrying a Pakistani girl there and then sponsoring my parents and my brother and sister from New York to Pakistan.
Alex: But I hear you can find lots of good American girls in Karachi &nbs p;and Lahore.
John: Yeah, but I prefer Pakistani girls. They are so much more superior to our girls, and what great brunette complexion they have!
Alex: What city are you going to?
John: Karachi. The company has an office in downtown Saddar. Yeah, the salary is good but the cost of living is quite high because of all the people flocking to this high-tech Mecca.
Alex: I hear the exchange rate is now $100 to a Rupee! That's just too much. What about Quetta and Peshawar? What are they like?
John: No idea. But they are cheaper than Karachi, which is the world's headquarters for information technology now.
Alex: I hear the quality of life in Pakistan is incredible.
John: Yeah, man. You can buy a BMW for Rs.30,000, and a Mercedes for less than Rs.45,000. But my dream is to p urch ase a Suzuki Turbo FX-800 which costs roughly Rs.90,000. But what a sweet design, great curves, and it purrs to the touch.
Alex: By the way, which company are you gonna work for?
John: Haji Jalal Puttarjee & Bros. Technologies, a pure Pakistani conglomerate specializing in embedded software.
Alex: Man, you're so lucky to work for a pure Pakistani company. They are really intelligent and unlike any American body shops that have opened their fly-by-night outfits in Pakistan. The Pakistani companies pay you even when you're on the bench. My friend, Paul Allen, used his bench time to visit the Makran Coast, the most gorgeous resort in Pakistan, I hear.
John: Yeah, man, you're right. I hope the US learns something from them and follows in their footsteps. It seems all we do is borrow more and more money f rom the Askari Bank.
Alex: How are you going to cope with their language?
John: I've been learning Urdu since my school days. I always dreamed that one day I'll head for Pakistan ever since my uncle bought me that T-Shirt from Islamia College. At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Urdu and were quite impressed by my score in TOUFL (Test of Urdu as a Foreign Language).
Alex: Boy! You're so damn lucky.
John: Yeah. I'll be travelling in the world's fastest train, Tezgam, I'll be visiting the world's largest theme park in Changa Manga, and I'll be visiting the famous Lollywood where I might meet the sons and daughters of movie legends like Nadeem, Sultan Rahi, Anjuman, Reema and the gorgeous of all, Madam Babra Sharif.
Alex: You know, the Pakistani President is scheduled to visi t USA next year and I hear that he may increase the number of employment visas.
John: That's very true. Last month, their Labour Minister, Naswar Khan Pakhtoon, visited the White House and donated Rs.20,000 for the re-development of the World Trade Centre at Silicon Valley, and has promised more if we follow the models of the fast developing high-tech cities, Gujranwalla and Raiwind. Bill Gates was lucky to have a chance to meet him. Very lucky person.
Alex: Will you be calling on Dave? I hear that he has made it big there and has a beautiful house on the Lyari River in Karachi.
John: Yeah, I'll be meeting him.
Alex: Anyway, nice chatting to you, John. Good luck, you lucky guy.
John: Yeah, and the same to you, Alex. By the way, don't ever go to the Pakistani Consulate in shalwar-kameez because t hey will think you're too Pakistanised and may doubt that you will ever come back, and your application will be rejected. And yes, don't forget to say to the Visa Officer politely: "As'salam-o-Alaikum, aap kaisay hain?" It will show them you're a cultured person

indeed it is

abnd btw, its afro turf :roll:

but u shudnt really post that, its offensive and racist

"Darth V-Hayder" wrote:

but u shudnt really post that, its offensive and racist

agree, that was offensive...if sum non-paki said somat like that bout pakis u'd be offended right?

im sorry to all those i caused offenced to , so to eqaul it out some paki man jokes

what you call a paki with one hair?
iq-bal

what you call a paki in between two houses ?
ali-way

what you call a paki with muscles ?
muscle-maan

if anyone has any paki jokes please state them i will not get offended but take it as humour

"naj" wrote:

loll........

THE FUTURE PAKISTAN
This would become reality in 2007 subject to the condition that we have a new president

Year: 2007

Two Top American Executives at IBM, USA...

I don't get it.

Pakistanis get a new president and they'll be the next big superpower in 2 years?

:?

Cheap shot at Pejaa if you ask me.

what dnt ya get man....its normally de pakis that be after visa 4 usa/uk, its just showing sum humour hw it'd be da other way round lollllll, dream on pakiland

pakistan zindabaaaaad :!:

"naj" wrote:

what dnt ya get man....its normally de pakis that be after visa 4 usa/uk, its just showing sum humour hw it'd be da other way round lollllll, dream on pakiland

pakistan zindabaaaaad :!:

On other places on the web this is called 'Pakistan in 2020'.

Then it's funny.

Putting the stuff in about 2007 and a new president just kills the humor.

LOL tru tru.....well i dint make it up now did i,

yep very touching and very true, i bet the shaytaan was with her as well making her forget bout allah

Shabab Pe Main Zara Si Sharab Phekunga
Kisi Hasin Ki Taraf Ye Gulaab Phekunga

Upon her beauty I will splash a little intoxicant,
Upon a beauty I will throw a rose.

Parda Hai, Parda Hai
Parda Hai, Parda Hai

She is veiled, she is veiled.

Parda Hai Parda, Parde Ke Pichhe, Parda Nashin Hai
Parda Nashin Ko Be-Parda Na Kar Dun To
Akbar Mera Nam Nahin Hai
Parda Hai Parda...

She is veiled, behind the veil is a lover of veils.
If I dont unveil the lover of veils then Akbar is not my name.
She is veiled.

Na Dar Zalim Zamaane Se, Ada Se Ya Bahane Se
Zara Apani Surat Dikha De, Sama Khoobsurat Bana De
Nahin To Tera Nam Leke, Tujhe Koi Ilzaam Deke
Tujhako Is Mehfil Men Rusava Na Kar Dun To
Akbar Mera Nam Nahin Hai
Parda Hai Parda...

Dont be afraid of this oppressive time, or from custom or from censure,
Just give me a glimpse of your face, make this a beautiful time.
Otherwise I will take your name, malign you,
and if I dont steal you away from this very gathering
then my name isnt Akbar.

She is veiled.

Quran vs. Sports Car
A young man was getting ready to graduate college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.

As Graduation Day approached, the young man waited signs that his father had purchased the car. finally, on the morning of his graduation his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. he handed his son a beautiful wrapped gift box.

Curious, but somewhat disapponted the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Quran. Angrily, he raised his voice at his father and said "With all your money you give me a Quran?" and stormed out of the house, leaving the holy book.

Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and a wonderful family, but relized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since the graduation day.

Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all his possessions to his son. He nedded to come home immediately and take care of things. When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search his father's important papers and saw the still new Quran, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Quran and began to turn th pages.

As he read those word, a car key dropped from an envelope taped behind the Quran. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired so long ago. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words ... Paid In Full.

such a touching story .......

There were 3 sufis walkin down da street and they saw a fit gyal. The 1st one goes' Maasha allah ' ; da 2nd goes ' subhanallah' da 3rd one goes ' inshaallah'. :shock:

"Princess_Of_Terror" wrote:

There were 3 sufis walkin down da street and they saw a fit gyal. The 1st one goes' Maasha allah ' ; da 2nd goes ' subhanallah' da 3rd one goes ' inshaallah'.

lol, herd that b4.

"Princess_Of_Terror" wrote:

There were 3 sufis walkin down da street and they saw a fit gyal. The 1st one goes' Maasha allah ' ; da 2nd goes ' subhanallah' da 3rd one goes ' inshaallah'. :shock:

lol, had that as a txt msg...but it werent sufis it were molvis, my bro deleted it :evil:

yeh i herd it as molvis aswell. Lol I told my mates at skul years back and they go u the third one inneh?

Astaghfirullah im not like that, when I say inshaALLAH its gonna only be for one lady.

LOL. I just copy and pasted it from somewhere, no offence 2 sufis intended