Verdict of Islam on Men Shaking Hands With Non-Mehram Women

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Abu the real deal wrote:
What is the big deal?

why are you lot stuck in medieval Arabia ?

If this is what you want go and live in Saudi 

My forebears came here to escape all that nonsense 

 

Well, they really didn't escape any nonsense, coz you were born. Lol.

 

Shaking hands with the opposite gender is haraam.

Men and women should not shake hands outside the mahram ties.

Hadith - Recorded by Malik, Ahmad, al-Nasai, al-Tirmidhi and ibn Majah.

[Al-Albani has graded it sahih. Al-Albani, Sahih al-Jami, vol. 1, p. 494.]

The Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam (Peace and Blessings be upon him) said, "I do not shake the hands of women."

Hadith - Bukhari 9:321 (& 7:211)

The Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam (Peace and Blessings be upon him) used to take the Pledge of allegiance from the women by words only after reciting this Holy Verse: (60.12) "..that they will not associate anything in worship with Allah." (60.12) And the hand of Allah's Apostle did not touch any woman's hand except the hand of that woman his right hand possessed. (i.e. his captives or his lady slaves).

Hadith - Sahih Muslim, narrated 'A'isha (ra)

By Allah, the hand of the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam (Peace and Blessings be upon him) never touched the hand of a woman. By Allah, the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam (Peace and Blessings be upon him) never took any vow from women except that which Allah had ordered him to take, and his palm never touched the palm of a woman. When he had taken their vow, he would tell that he had taken the oath from them orally.

 

 

 

Pathetic

 

Why bother to come here then ?

 

If its haraam to shake hands then why live in non muslim lands ?

Abu wrote:
Pathetic

 

Why bother to come here then ?

 

If its haraam to shake hands then why live in non muslim lands ?

Non muslim lands don't belong to non muslims, the entire earth belongs to Allah. May Allah liberate the entire world from Kufr at the hands of the mujahideen with strict code of Islamic warfare, so they may not remain a single place on earth where the Adhan (the greatness of Allah) is not heard 5 times a day. Ameen.

I always thought and was taught that in Islam your actions will be judged on your intentions. In the  21st Century its expected that you shake people's hands. Its professional and its a good way of saying you mean business - in an interview you shake hands first, if a hand was offered and you refused it it wouldn't give  a very good first impression. As long as the intention is clean and to just greet someone then whats the issue. A handshake in todays society isnt seen as seduction or flirty or whatever whereas a peck on the cheek though the intention may be to just greet that person can be seen as a bit inapporpriate. 

So basically what i'm trying to say is that as long as what your doing doesnt seem flirtatous and that your intentions are clean then why cause unnecessay awkwardness and seem rude to other people who won't understand why you refused to shake their hand?

 

 

hahahahaha what rubbish

 

If the earth begins to Allah why does he allow so many muslims to die so horribly ? Why dont you go and live somewhere with fellow muslims instead of living here and claiming benefits for your family ?

Try getting a job .

Seraphim wrote:

Lol same thing happened to me at the bank. After concluding our meeting, she stood up facing me, as im assuming thats how she concludes all business meetings, ready to shake my hand.

And i just got up, thanked her for her time, put the cup of tea down before I turned and left.

If she wants to shake my hand, she can put a ring on it first lmao

You are so cool. We should all batter our eyelashes at your story and admire you for just putting your cup of tea down like that and leaving.

Alternatively you could have just said thanks and declined the handshake explaining briefly. Makes you respectable.

I read this and thought: Twat.

Accountontherevival wrote:
Seraphim wrote:

Lol same thing happened to me at the bank. After concluding our meeting, she stood up facing me, as im assuming thats how she concludes all business meetings, ready to shake my hand.

And i just got up, thanked her for her time, put the cup of tea down before I turned and left.

If she wants to shake my hand, she can put a ring on it first lmao

You are so cool. We should all batter our eyelashes at your story and admire you for just putting your cup of tea down like that and leaving.

Alternatively you could have just said thanks and declined the handshake explaining briefly. Makes you respectable.

I read this and thought: Twat.

 

calm down.

what the purpose of a handshake? thank the person? amongst other thing. and what did he do, thank her. sooo why the unnecessary additional contact?

 

now, thinking abt the purpose of the handshake. its so obscure and mixed feeling-ish lol so i wouldnt want to share that with a random guy whom im suppose to have a "professional" relationship with.

everybody's looking at this from the point of view, "we are refusing to shake hands". how about "we are forced to shake hands"? coz at the end of the day. we ARE. why do we feel so shitty an embarrased and come up with excuses like "faint in bollywood style", if this society was really all about freedom blah blah blah we wld feel the same way whether we shaked of didnt?

 

well..i was at my aunt and my cuz (a grown up) was having fer friend and her hubby over for dinner. they're new muslims and they walked in and the lady starts shaking everybody's hands, including my dad's, I was like "wouah.." and then right behind her is whoo?? her hubby! who's also shaking hands and so i find this hand being brandished in my direction! and there was no escape coz the kitchen was pretty small especially with the table spread out all along its length, i was cornered. my father on my left, the kitchen top pressing into my back and euh...lots of people on my right (?) i just kinda shaked my head and waves my hands and smiled. smooth-ish. i felt like i was going so red. i had my embarassment AND HIS on my shoulders!

once..this muslim busdriver, on eid, said eid mubarak to me, theeeen he STUCK HIS HAND OUT FOR ME TO SHAKE! WHAAAT? i shaked it in the surprised and afterwards i was like urrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhh. (that was ages ago)

recently i have evolved, and so have my super powers. I give off a "i dont shake hands" vibe. i swear! i completed this course and they were giving certificates and the guy didnt even try to shake my hand. (or maybe he did but ididnt see? i was too worried abt having to take a FREAKING PICTURE URGH!) but then i noticed he shaked all the others hands so i thought "wait, i didnt have to go through this ordeal just now.. ALLAH HAS SAVED ME!!!!!" 

 

i think i might end up making a guy feel like "why are you trying to shake my hand for?!" if he puts his hand forward. well alhamdoulillah though, no, shaking hand trial has occured recently. cnt thank Allah enough for this.  plus im a bit of a weirdo..who wanna shake hands with a weirdo. IT IS contagious.

 

plus urgh, theres so many stories out there of sleazy guys making a handshake what it shldnt be.

 

all the stories and joking aside.

WHY DO WE SHAKE HANDS?!

 

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

did anybody mention the stuff about shaking hands with your own gender leads to plenty of reward, increase in love, following the sunnah, forgiving of sins. so you've got half the world's hands to shake. thats about 6 billion hands actually if you do double shakes. aaaaaand you can shake hands with all the kids in the world.

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Lilly wrote:
Accountontherevival wrote:
Seraphim wrote:

Lol same thing happened to me at the bank. After concluding our meeting, she stood up facing me, as im assuming thats how she concludes all business meetings, ready to shake my hand.

And i just got up, thanked her for her time, put the cup of tea down before I turned and left.

If she wants to shake my hand, she can put a ring on it first lmao

You are so cool. We should all batter our eyelashes at your story and admire you for just putting your cup of tea down like that and leaving.

Alternatively you could have just said thanks and declined the handshake explaining briefly. Makes you respectable.

I read this and thought: Twat.

 

calm down.

what the purpose of a handshake?

 

 

I wasn't angry or annoyed. Just think theres a difference between being cool and being a twat.

A handshake is a form of greeting. My first initial thought on handshakes going through this thread was, 'what is the big deal?' and something Titanium said earlier made sense to me. But then I thought, every little thing in this world nowadays is analysed to death. And sometimes its a good thing. I don't really see how a handshake can be seductive. If a man or a woman is really turned on by  a handshake then I personally think he or she has issues. But if one of the hadiths specifically go against handshakes and because we should follow it as it is sunnah, then I really dont see what the big deal is in being polite about it so the othert person doesnt think you're being rude. Of course, the situation can be awkward and make you feel silly sometimes as 'its just a handshake'. But if the other person doesn't respect then really...at the end of the day....who cares? Stick to what you believe in and either be good about it or dont bother arguing about something not worth it. Stop flouncing around the topic like as if someone has asked you to shoot someone or something.

I apologise for the wordy paragraph above. My hands are cold and this coffee is not helping.

i agree with everything you said.

so, if shaking hands is a form of greeting, like any other, then we shld have the total 50/50 choice to take part in it or not, or even answer in another way. you wanna greet me, lets wave, or just say hello or whatever.

 

its not a big deal. thats true. the people who get offended and who will make you feel like a backward cavewoman is the person who has issues.

and as i said. sometimes..someone will hold your hand in a way that just aint meant to be... and will make you feel somehow..violated. again. that person has issues. (disclaimer: im not saying we shlsnt shake hands with guys coz of that. that'd be saying that most males are sleazy pervs which aint true.)

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Lilly wrote:
i agree with everything you said.

so, if shaking hands is a form of greeting, like any other, then we shld have the total 50/50 choice to take part in it or not, or even answer in another way. you wanna greet me, lets wave, or just say hello or whatever.

 

its not a big deal. thats true. the people who get offended and who will make you feel like a backward cavewoman is the person who has issues.

and as i said. sometimes..someone will hold your hand in a way that just aint meant to be... and will make you feel somehow..violated. again. that person has issues. (disclaimer: im not saying we shlsnt shake hands with guys coz of that. that'd be saying that most males are sleazy pervs which aint true.)

I feel like you're waffling here. Just because someone makes you feel like a cavewoman doesnt mean they have issues. You have to understand that they might find it strange and just not understand. If they want to hear it out, tell them. If they dont want to, leave them be. Dont be a hypocrite with your words. I mean reading through this forum and these little stories everyone has to say, you're on a general level making the other person sound like an idiot.

And finally, dont know what you're chatting about in the last paragraph.

so you didnt get my last paragraph. therefore you got the 5 lines before it right. and 5 lines =waffling? wouaw.

i guess thats just the way i talk eh? i waffle.

yes, someone has a problem if they make you feel like you're backward just because you're not shaking their hands.

so whenever i dont understand a chemical concept, i shld make my chem teacher feel like they're in the wrong? you're the one waffling now.

if they wanna know, they wouldnt make you feel like a caveman in the first place. they'll ask a question. thats usually how humans inquire about things they want to know about/dont understand.

 

how am i being a hypocrite? please, never meant to. so point it out.

 

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Abu wrote:
I wonder what the prophet would have said about the following story ;

I know this is really irrelevant to this topic, but reading this article just sent something down my spine. This stuff hurts, deep down in the core, it hurts. May Allah guide all the parents in this world to become better parents and help us all in this temporary abode.

 

Hummus wrote:
Abu wrote:
I wonder what the prophet would have said about the following story ;

I know this is really irrelevant to this topic, but reading this article just sent something down my spine. This stuff hurts, deep down in the core, it hurts. May Allah guide all the parents in this world to become better parents and help us all in this temporary abode.

Yeah i heard about this on the news too. Made me feel sick.

But i guess there will always be stupid people in the world. 

May God grant them some sense.

And I heard as it were, the noise of thunder. One of the four beasts saying come and see and I beheld, a pale horse. And his name that sat on him was Death... and Hell followed with him.

I have something to share with you guys. In my sixth form we have a Muslim female Biology teacher, i'll call her Mrs B. So a day or two before parents evening, Mrs B made a polite announcement, asking all her students to not be offended. She told them to remind their older brother and fathers to not shake her hand before and after the meeting because it isn't approapriate for her. I thought this was pretty brave and good of her. No-one seemed to have a problem with it.

 

Abu wrote:
hahahahaha what rubbish

 

If the earth begins to Allah why does he allow so many muslims to die so horribly ? Why dont you go and live somewhere with fellow muslims instead of living here and claiming benefits for your family ?

Try getting a job .

 

Every soul shall taste death. And We test you by evil and by good by way of

trial. To Us must you return." (al-Anbiyaa 21:36)

 

The message is clear, everyone will die and this life is just a probation on this earth, our

faith will be tested by many things. Some are tested by calamities and some are

tested by good things of this life and at the end we will return to Allah so

that we be appraised according to our test results.

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