i think pretty much everyone would...

I don’t want to go off on one…but I couldn’t love, respect or stay with such a man who prevented me from seeing my parents.

I understand the concept of obedience to the husband. However, I also know how easily hatred can generate between couples if one or the other abuses their rights.

Someone I know was in the same dilemma…husband prevented her from seeing her sick father, father died…she lost all love and respect for her husband and left him.

It true. We had a scholar come down to our mosque and give a talk about the right and responsibility of the family. He quoted many hadith where it indicated that obidence is a two way thing build on respect and understanding. Some people are too rigid in this aspect IMO. Afterall it is stated in the Quran about the wife

"But consort with them in kindness, for if you hate them it may happen that you hate a thing wherein Allah has placed much good." 4:19

Bear in mind, the Sahabi RA mentioned in the hadis, as far as we know, had no idea what had transpired with the womans father.

So heRA was not keeping herRA from seeing and ill and dying father, he keeping her RA in the house.

I get the feeling that the wife RA had a choice in that she RA chose to obey her RA husband RA on the advice (and huqm?) of the Holy Prophet SAW, why else would she RA be forgiven for her 'obediance' if it was a forced thing.

If the husband RA had been aware of the ill and dying father, it could have gone a diffirent way.

"Dawud" wrote:

If the husband RA had been aware of the ill and dying father, it could have gone a diffirent way.

Thats what the "so called scholars" said too :shock:

its time for me to leave the pardah of my house-walk down the streets and attend a study circle

i think the talk today is gonna be on pardah

chat to u in a bit guys

Salam

Prophet Muhammad taught that two qualities of shame and submission are essential for a wife.

However, woman would only obey a man she truly respects.

That means that true obedience is conditional:

She would only WANT to obey a man whom she really adores.

All other men whom she did not really honour, them she would "obey"
only out of necessity or convenience, and NOT out of her heart's desire.

The lower the respect she has for him, the less the ear she will give to his wishes.

Most men still do not know that women are very
good judges of souls. Men think that they can continue to fool
women with the usual tricks with flowers and money.

Omrow

Its true.

One would only go out of their way to obey someone whom they truely loved and respected.

"Med" wrote:

The point to be taken away is how women are meant to obey their husbands and how even Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam did not issue order to override that of the husband.

This is a discussion forum, so lets discuss!

1. A woman has a right to divorce granted in islam.
2. We have not been presented background info on this womans situation.
3. If the woman thought the husband was being unnecessarily harsh, she would ahve her ways to convince him, or to leave the marriage.

That means not only did she understand her husbands reasoning, she agreed.

However she still had an emotional attachment to her father, even though she agreed with her husband.

The Prophet made it clear it was a husband/wife dispute, not something that warranted anyone to be overruled.

Now she could either convince her husband, or askk for divorce. She did neither. She was blessed for listening to her husband.

Thus the whole nasiyah on the majlis site is flawed.

"Med" wrote:

"MuslimSister" wrote:

"Med" wrote:

The so-called scholars of today if confronted with such a situation would begin finding 101 excuses to allow the woman to leave her home and see her father; they would perhaps say play on the importance of parents, the high status of the father, the reward of visiting the sick, the need for necessity, the need to be lenient in extreme circumstances, the importance of maintaining blood relations and ties of kith and kin, the fact that if the husband were present he would most likely allow her to go and see her father.

.

I agree with the "so called Scholars".

I agree with my Master Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam.
.

u mean u agree with a un-referenced copy pasted text from the Majlis website :roll:

Women do have a right to divorce. It has a diferent method from men, but the right exists. Do not argue about semantics.

Are you saying that a wife cannot leave an abusive husband?

Next you are gonna say they are not allowed to own property. :?

(and I admit, some of what I wrote is incorrect... I can admit when I make mistakes)

Here, her husband asked her to stay home. She did, and Allah (swt) rewarded her.

However these days, we have mobiles. The wife could phone the husband.

I would not use this hadith on its own to judge the situation, as if he was ill, he could still have been brought to her...

...and in a marriage it is give and take. A woman will have means to get her husband to listen to her. Women are crafty. We should be wary. :twisted:

"MuslimSisLilSis" wrote:

"Med" wrote:

"MuslimSister" wrote:

"Med" wrote:

The so-called scholars of today if confronted with such a situation would begin finding 101 excuses to allow the woman to leave her home and see her father; they would perhaps say play on the importance of parents, the high status of the father, the reward of visiting the sick, the need for necessity, the need to be lenient in extreme circumstances, the importance of maintaining blood relations and ties of kith and kin, the fact that if the husband were present he would most likely allow her to go and see her father.

.

I agree with the "so called Scholars".

I agree with my Master Muhammad salallahu alayhi wa sallam.
.

u mean u agree with a un-referenced copy pasted text from the Majlis website :roll:

quoting himself: "I have no reference for this hadeeth. I copied and pasted article from website themajlis.net. "

"Admin" wrote:

...and in a marriage it is give and take. A woman will have means to get her husband to listen to her. Women are crafty. We should be wary. :twisted:

Mr Admin

u overestimate us :twisted:

[size=7]underesitimate...[/size]

"Med" wrote:

I have no reference for this hadeeth. I copied and pasted article from website themajlis.net. It is in the section entitled naseehah.

I cannot provide reference for this hadeeth, I am not a muhaddith simply regurgitated the article from the website mentioned above.

u dont need to be a muhaddith to provide a reference to a hadith, i am not asking you to ESTABLISH the reference. whether it is Sahih, da'eef, from Muslim, Bukhari etc. is obviously something that has already been established by muhaditheen, i am just asking you to provide this info.

it is in fact the duty of every muslim to ensure they are not misleading other muslims by qouting maudu' hadith, this is especially important when we get such info off the net - we must check the references for Quranic ayat and Ahadith before posting them here.