Articles

Issue 7: Aliyah & Jameela

published by MuslimSister on 9 March, 2007 - 00:00
Author: 
Alveena Salim

Ali has been sent down for 18 months for selling Cannabis and Jamal has gone to Egypt to study Islam. In their place we have:

Jameela: Asalaam alaikum sister. I haven't seen you in time.

Aliyah: You'll never guess who just asked me out!!!

Jameela: Who?

Aliyah: Iky baby!!!!!!

Jameela: Ikram? The one who looks like Sonic the Hedgehog? Why you messing around with that good- for- nothing unemployed dosser. All he does is drive round the same block 50 times a day!

Ali has been sent down for 18 months for selling Cannabis and Jamal has gone to Egypt to study Islam. In their place we have:

Jameela: Asalaam alaikum sister. I haven’t seen you in time.

You Got Mail!

published by MuslimSister on 9 March, 2007 - 00:00
Author: 
Alveena Salim

SweetGyal says… Phew, he's gone, dat was close-lol

Romeo007 says… Wat happnd?

SweetGyal says… My old man came in, so i had to close the window.

Romeo007 says… Lol-wat did he want?

SweetGyal says… He wanted to no why I was on the comp at 2.30am. i told him i was workin on an important college project due in 2moro.

Romeo007 says… LOL

SweetGyal says… Trust me, ma folks don't no jack, dey wouldn't no the diff between Microsoft Word and MSN Messenger.

SweetGyal says… Phew, he’s gone, dat was close-lol

Romeo007 says… Wat happnd?

Muslims - You Gotta Integrate!

published by Sajid Iqbal on 9 March, 2007 - 00:00

I don’t know about you but I’m sick to death of every Tony, Trevor and David bangin’ on about Muslim integration.

From the issue of the veil to the bombings of 7/7, from the cartoon hoo haa to the Pope’s outburst and from Muslim schools to ‘Muslim ghettos’... yep you’ve guessed it- it’s all because Muslims don’t integrate, innit!

Yeah didn’t you know... ’these Muslims need to integrate more... if they wanna live in our country then they need to live like we do!’.

Life's Too Short

published by MuslimSister on 28 October, 2006 - 01:00

By Alveena Salim

We live in such a fast society. Fast food, fast cars, fast internet and fast communication all means that it's easier to keep touch with loved ones.

However, despite living in such a fast society, how come we're always in a rush? How come we don't have time to keep in touch or to visit loved ones? And how come there are not enough hours in the day to just stop and think of someone other than our own selves?

The underlying reason behind our "busy lifestyle" is that we're selfish; we fail to think or be there for others, because we're too busy worrying about our own selves.

Issue 6: Turkey Of The Month!

published by Beast on 16 September, 2006 - 01:00

By Irfan Jalil

This issue of the Revival has had the displeasure of having to sift through numerous candidates for the un-coveted prize of Turkey of the Month.

First off was the farcical raid by Sir Ian ‘Turkey’ Blair’s Metropolitan police on the home of two Muslim bothers and their family. 250 anti-terrorist officers in full protective gear and guns to boot forced themselves into a single terraced house looking for a chemical suicide-vest-type bomb.

The Revival's Guide to Ramadan

published by Sajid Iqbal on 16 September, 2006 - 01:00

You mean you can't eat ANYTHING? Not even drink water? Isn't that like bad for you?

Yep, when Muslims fast for the 30 days in the month of Ramadan from dawn till dusk they can't eat or drink anything throughout Ramadan.

Fasting is not bad for your health, even Celebs occasionally fast (they call it (detox), abstaining from food and drink cleans out your insides, gives your digestive system a rest and causes harmful chemicals to be flushed out of your system.(1)

30 whole days?! You'd die!

Ermm¦ No you wouldn't. Muslims are required to fast from dawn to dusk. The fast begins just before dawn when Muslims eat a light meal (suhoor) and confirm their intention to fast for the day; the fast ends at sunset.

Home & Away

published by MuslimSister on 16 September, 2006 - 01:00

By Alveena Salim

Have things ever got so hectic that you seriously thought about running away from home? Has your family or so called mates peed you off so much that you considered packing your bags and leaving just to show ‘em? Have you ever been subjected to extreme physical/emotional abuse and thought that running away is the only answer to your problems? Or maybe you know or have heard of someone who was forced to take such a drastic action.

Exclusive Interview With Yvonne Ridley

published by mayoub on 16 September, 2006 - 01:00

By Irfan Khan and Mohammad Ayoub

Yvonne Ridley is probably the most popular revert to Islam, since her conversion back in 2001 after she was captured by the Taliban.

Since embracing Islam she hosts a talk show on Islam Channel and is very outspoken with her views on current issues and how Muslims should behave.

The Revival has met up with sister Yvonne to ask her a few questions.

Revival: Asalamalaykum (Peace be upon You)

Sister Yvonne Ridley: Wa allaykum Salam (Peace be upon you too)

Issue 6: Ali Wannabe & Jamal!

published by Sajid Iqbal on 16 September, 2006 - 01:00

By Irfan Khan and Sajid Iqbal

Ali: Easy Yo

Jamal: Easy to you as well!

Ali: Na na Bro u got it all wrong its easy 'Yo' not You

Jamal: I prefer Asalamalaikum

Ali: Yeah… just too many words for me. Bro you been seeing what go on in Labnaan? Them getting proper messed up man.

Jamal: Yes brother it's terrible what is happening in LEBANON, just make dua for all those innocent people affected.

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