salaam
This is, especially child abuse, a topic we are writing on in a future issue of The Revival Magazine.
Its an issue which unfortunately is not openly discussed in mosques/ radio discussions/homes etc....
it skind of brushed under the carpet. Its like a massive taboo.
It needs to be raised. It needs to be addressed at all levels/platforms/ people of power and responsibility.
The victims shouldnt feel shame. they have been abused by sick people.
im sure this is an issue that exist across the UK in muslim communities.
does anyone else know of victims or am i over reacting?
is anyone aware of any help /advice/counselling available?
whose job should it be to raise this issue? are we all responsible to protect our young ones from this abuse?
does anyone know of professionsals in this field?
pls do share your views
wasalaam
I'm sure it happens but I'm not aware of anything.
It is the governments job to protect it from happening in the first place, and when it does happen, the offenders are not punished severely. Some of these sickos get a few years prison sentence. Capital punishment should be reinstated.
Paedophiles, murderers, rapists, armed robbers, basically any serious crime should carry the death sentence. Should also ease the overcrowding situation. Kill two birds with one stone.
No you're not over reacting. it does happen and if we shut up and put up with it then we're stuffed. This guy said: "The triumph of evil is that good men do nothing."
And the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) siad: "There's no taboo in Islam."
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
Remember Stefan Kiszko? Remember the Birmingham Six? Guildford Four? Bridgewater Four? What if we later find out that they're innocent. I went to this Behind Bars conference for Law, Sociology and Psychology students (except I don't do psychology) and there was this guy who was sexually harassed my a naked man. The guy flew into a rage and beat the man up, after realising his mistake he went to call an ambulance. After returning, he found that someone had moved him so he died. What did the jury say? Guilty of murder. Not manslaughter. What did the judge say: 12 years in prison.
Not an anger mangement course.
Don't get me wrong, I think if there's a 100% chance that someone is a serial killer or rapist then I'm in favour of hanging them. But just being tough on crime and not its causes ain't good enough. Some people can't change. Some can, by education and rehab. It works for most people.
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
[b]Let him have it[/b], that's what I say.
Anyway, there's a lovely park next to my work called Lincoln's Inn Fields. Its next to the Royal Courts of Justice.
Its where they used to hang people back in the day.
Don't just do something! Stand there.
I prefer the Tower of London, where they used to torture and behead people!
people within same house are doing zina to other people in the family. i was involved as well. theres a load of things that you dont talk about to anyone. im only telling this coz its confindential here. when me own bro got married i really fancied his mrs she was very pretty so i couldnt control meself after a few weeks of their marriage. one day forced meself on her. no one was home then. she kept it secret coz she feared me bro would kick her out. this made me more attracted to her so i slept with her many times almost every night when me bro would on night shift. she didnt like it but knew she could not tell anyone. this carried on for about 2 years then i got a job a got me own house and i used to tell her to come over. i used to do it with her in me own home. she didnt like it but had no choice. i stopped it when i got thinking that this is no good i shouldnt be doing this to me own bro. she is happy that i dont touch her no more.
Wrong answer. It doesn't matter if she's married to your bro or not. Bottom line is, you shouldn't be doing that to no-one's wife... except yours.
Would you like sleeping with your mum... or perhaps your sister? I wouldn't think so.
I suggest you sincerely repent to Allah (swt) because you should be more worried about His punishment. And also ask your bro's wife to forgive you.
you need to make sincere tawba.
Firstly, I want to say that at least you have the guts to admit your fault. By no means, am I congradulating you for what you did! Make no mistake of that! I don't think it was funny, clever, or brave. But what's done is done and moaning about it won't help. Mate, now's your chance to turn your life around, ask Allah and your sister--in-law for forgiveness and prove to them and yourself that you've changed. Can you trust yourself? Until you can prove that to yourself you can't change. It's tough but it's worth it, in the end.
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
IF he is telling the truth i dont know how you lot can be soo calm about it. The skanky F***** has just been raping his sister in law for the past 2 years!!!
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
I get that but, the skanky father uncle cousin kinger isn't physically here to be used as a punch bag. There's no way we can PROVE that he did it. Don't worry, Allah will judge him. Allah will judge him.
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
oh my god!
i cant believe that he has just calmly admitted to that. if i was his sister-in-law id never forgive him and i think i speek for alot of women too.
thats just disgusting and damn cruel, the poor helpless woman must of been so scared for them torturing years and is probably still frightened that he might do it again when ever he feels the urge.
just sickening.
Typical! Blaming the woman when she gets raped.
You people make me sick... SICK!!!
Anyway, I agree that she could have stopped this from happening in the future if she did something about it instead of keeping quiet.
It's not like she was dancing trying to get him into bed! He raped her! The only mistake she made was keep quiet about it. Do you honestly think that getting raped is a sin? No one chooses to get raped! Because then that's not rape. All we can do is say to those victims that help is out there and if your family just brush your claims aside then they're the ones with the problems not you. There IS help out there.
Here're a few numbers
Samaritans UK
08457 90 90 90
Childline for children and young people
0800 1111
Help for adults
0808 800 5000
Click on the link for more information
Hope that helps someone
http://www.dontgiveup.me.uk/id23.html
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
You haven't been raped so you don't know how it feels.
You can't comment.
Don't just do something! Stand there.
the donkey has not commented again, i think he was a spammer with gutter thoughts.
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:shock: maybe she didnt have a choice. There are a lot of reason why women dont speak out, the main reason being will anyone believe them.
Maybe there was more then her marriage at stake. Maybe she is a woman from back home and fears deportation if she spoke out. As much as i hate to admit this men are physically stronger. So the first time he forced himself on her maybe he was too strong and she couldnt fight him off. Maybe she thought that if i tell my husband what that sicko did to me that he wont believe me an accuse me of having an affair with his brother. After all its the sickos word against hers. Say if the husband does interrogate his bro what if he makes out that she wanted it.
Im making the assumption that she is a woman from back home. There is a lot more at stake (ie deportation, being disowned by her own family) for them in comparison to a British born woman and also no British born would ever put up with that.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
Assallamu Allaikum,
With all the respect that you deserve I have to say, Ahmed K, that you are one sick individual.
This is one of the reasons that I don't post on here much anymore, too many wishy washy moderates. And before any one says a thing I know that we should do all things in moderation.
But for a senseless, mindless rapist to come on here and have the blatant audacity to try and ease his conscience with a few less than serious trumpet blasts about being wrong because of his brother, is astounding.
I am by no means a "radicle" but you don't deserve the space that you take up. You have taken advantage of someone that you knew was vulnerable and in no position to be able to defend herself, possibly physically but definately emotionally. She now has to live with that for the rest of her life while you move on with your swollen ego and virtue, in your mind, intact.
I wish your brother would find out and deal with you in the way that I would if that were my wife or sister, but I suppose he would only blame her too.
You are disgusting.
Wassallam.
well said cofo!
Assallamu Allaikum,
With all the respect that you deserve I have to say, Ahmed K, that you are one sick individual.
This is one of the reasons that I don't post on here much anymore, too many wishy washy moderates. And before any one says a thing I know that we should do all things in moderation.
But for a senseless, mindless rapist to come on here and have the blatant audacity to try and ease his conscience with a few less than serious trumpet blasts about being wrong because of his brother, is astounding.
I am by no means a "radicle" but you don't deserve the space that you take up. You have taken advantage of someone that you knew was vulnerable and in no position to be able to defend herself, possibly physically but definately emotionally. She now has to live with that for the rest of her life while you move on with your swollen ego and virtue, in your mind, intact.
I wish your brother did find out and deal with you in the way that I would if that were my sister or wife, but I suppose he would only blame her too.
You are disgusting.
Wassallam.
you can say THAT again!
Don't just do something! Stand there.
Assallamu Allaikum,
Apparently so? I am obviously more angry than even I thought.
Wassallam.
OK, so what should Ahmed K do to turn his life around? At the moment he's being used as a cyber punch bag, but that's not going to change him. We can't PROVE he's a rapist. So, he needs to sort himself out and repent to Allah. But how?
Chin up, mate! Life's too short.
im sorry but to me it feels like he's bragging about it and doesnt seem to show any remorse to what he's done. he dosent just need Allah to punish him he needs the law of this country.
im sorry but to me it feels like he's bragging about it and doesnt seem to show any remorse to what he's done. he dosent just need Allah to punish him he needs the law of this country.
Assallamu Allaikum,
That doesn't prove he was sick a rapist and a bully?
Get a grip? What does he have to do?
Wassallam.
Ditto.
There is no such thing as confidentiality on the WWW.
I think there is something in the Quran/Hadith which says something along the lines of if the person you have wronged does not forgive you then Allah(swt) wont. He needs to beg for forgiveness from his sister in law and his bro as well as Allah (swt).
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
If she doesn't forgive him, then on the Day of Judgement she can take away the rewards for any good deeds that he might have done. If he doesn't have any good deeds, then she can pass on the punishment for any sins that she may have committed.
But it is still better for her to forgive him(even for something like this).
Don't just do something! Stand there.
We don't need to prove anything. He needs to make sincere repentance either way. If he was telling the truth then it's rape, and if he wasn't telling the truth then it's lying. The conditions for sincere repentance:
1) Stop committing the sin.
2) Feeling guilty for what you did.
3) Promise yourself that you're not going to do it again.
3) If you hurt someone/stole something then you have to ask them for forgiveness/return the item back.
I used to work in family law where I would come into contact with women - from a variety of backgrounds - who had suffered/were suffering very real horrific, shocking and frightening abuse. Many of these women are VERY vulnerable individuals, and are VERY hesitant to take any real action (ie moving out to a refuge) because they have children (an dont want to rock the boat), family pressure (usually from "back home"), emotional and psychological threats and control over them, fear of repercussions on themselves/their children/their family members, naivity of life/living very isolated lives, ignorance of help or support services available. It takes a LOT of strength to stand up to an abusive person - particularly if you take the above factors into consideration for them.
No one should ever blame the woman/child - if they had the choice, they wouldnt have chosen that for themselves, right?
I make du'a that Allah swt relieves her suffering and pain, grants her, and all such innocent sufferers the strength and patience to deal with their ordeals. Grants her protection, the courage to stand up against any harm, blesses her with true justice and freedom - both in dunya and akhira, and cause it to be a reason for her to attain Jannatul Firdous. Ameen.
May Allah swt open the heart of the guy to the horror of his crimes, the reality of the situation, and sick consequences of his heinous, evil actions. May Allah swt guide him to the right. Ameen.
[size=10](I have a very delicate personality, but I really feel like finding his IP address and demonstrating some brick throwing grr.)[/size]
May Allah shine sweet faith upon you this day and times beyond. May your heart be enriched with peace, and may your home be blessed always. Ameen.
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