THE "HOW TO" THREAD
Posted on Saturday, 9th June 2007 @ 10:30pm
we'l use this thread to share our skills and talents
we'l also ask others 'how to' do stuff that we dont know how to do
I'l start
how to get ur moneys worth at a buffet
-DONT keep on refilling ur coke - that'l make u full up
-DONT fill up on pasta's and bread, save that till the end
-eat slowly.
-when ur full - sit back chat for a bit and soon u'l have room for more
6 October 2006
44 weeks 4 days
right no refills. pasta at the end and........erm sit back and chit chat!! I going to nawab's tonight!!
live and let live!!!!!!!
24 June 2005
12 weeks 5 days
erm hello?
is everyone tight with their skills?
come on, share the love
-how do u bake a cake?
-how can u get banned?
-how can u change a tyre?
-how can u spend a 100quid in one hour
-how can u be lazy as Mr Admin?
24 June 2005
2 weeks 6 days
Unfortunately my skills amount to stuff you dont wanna know about or things which you may deem to frivilious to learn.
So.... until i feel like i can think of something worth contributing...
I can handle clouds, but cant fight with an eclipse.
24 May 2006
1 day 1 hour
can someone plz give me tips on "how to" make sure im drinking enough water
when im out, il carry a small bottle of water with me, when im home i dont drink any!!!
To be beautiful is to expect nothing in return.
4 April 2006
3 min 17 sec
that bottle of water counts as 1 glass of water, i'm guessing u mean them reali small bottles. so when u get bak home or whereva make sure u drink another 7 and each time u drink a glass/bottle make a lil note sumwer, eg mark it on ur hands maybe.
edit: oh, u sed u dnt drink any water when @ home. u sure u dnt? ur telling me u live on fizzys and in ur condition? hmm.. try robinsons
24 May 2006
1 day 1 hour
i do drink sum water but not enuf!!
no i dont drink fizzy n robinsons/dilute now and then- but stil not enuff
To be beautiful is to expect nothing in return.
21 November 2006
4 hours 17 sec
my friend used to down 7 big glasses of water before bed every night! it meant he would always wake up early in the morning cos he'd need the loo, but when he went to the doctor they told him he was damaging his liver.
remember that almost all food has water in it too- especially fruit and veg. u don't need to physically drink 7 whole glasses if u eat healthily, prob just 3 or 4.
if u wanna see if ur getting enough water, check ur wee. if its really dark yellow u need to drink more, if its almost clear then u need to cut down. the recommended wee-colour is yellowish-straw colour or something.
note: Ya'qub PLC is not responsible for any illnesses that occur due to u taking his advice.
Winter is the Springtime of the Muslim. Because Allah (swt) has made the nights long for worship, and the days short for fasting!
10 October 2005
3 hours 6 min
i find it hard drinkng water myself its just tastes real sour. Mix some cordially thats what i do. Another tip that works for me eat loads that way you drink more.
Ps i can confirm Doctor Ya'qub's diagnoses as correct
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
24 June 2005
12 weeks 5 days
my sisters drinks up to 8-10 glasses a day
keeps a water bottle with her
i drink up to 2 if that
im a coke addict
25 June 2005
30 weeks 5 days
erm i have to drink between 1.5 to 2 litres a day nurse told me, apparently its good for me.
Snoopz keep a large bottle of mineral water next to u in room u spend most ur time in. Drink throughout the day, rather than trying to down it all in one go, coz that's near impossible, and ull end up hating water.
If ur bored use diluted drinks, i do all the time.
Also try to finish water before late evening that way u won't be disturbed for toilet at night.
12 September 2005
21 weeks 1 day
Well well well.....
How to give up drugs (seen as lilsis could do with some advice)
Go to a courtroom, and beat up the judge...
then you will get 2 years imprisonment...
during this 2 years, you will have little access to drugs, and will not feel like taking any, becus ull need to be fully alert to keep urself safe at all times...
Viola.
on the Next episode of how to..... How to break outta prison (only to be executed once you know u r fully cured of the drug habit)
_____________- -SupeRazor- -_______________
Some ppl make their goals the stars.
They may live n die n never reach the stars,
but in the darkness of the night, those stars will guide them to their destination.
Becuz they made them in their eyesight
24 June 2005
2 min 26 sec
Where there is will there is a way.
Are you seriously trying to tell me they all go clean inside?
The enemy of my enemy is my... enemy.
21 November 2006
4 hours 17 sec
i read last year that someone was arrested for drug abuse in Saudi Arabia and his sentence was prison for 9 months, in which time he had to memorise the entire Qur'an. If he did this successfully he would be freed, otherwise he would serve a further 9 months!
I don't know how he got on
Winter is the Springtime of the Muslim. Because Allah (swt) has made the nights long for worship, and the days short for fasting!
25 June 2005
2 weeks 5 days
How to grab a bargain.
When you see something you like...dont buy it straightaway. Keep your eye on it, sooner or later it'l go on sale and thats when you should grab it (most retail stuff goes on sale after a month or so).
I had my eyes on these shoes for £50 which I managed to get for £25 today, whilst my sister walked away with boots for £30 that were orginally £90 and a coat for £20 which was orginally £80!
Just keep an eye on what you want (esp online) and remember, patience is a virtue.
24 June 2005
2 weeks 6 days
How to fire a Crossbow
The crossbow is a weapon made famous by the Star Wars trilogy (Wookie Bowcaster) and Buffy the Vampire Slayer and other such shows. The crossbow is much like an ordinary bow but with a rifle shuved but its arse. It uses a fast moving string to launch projectiles (arrows) much like a bow but with the addition of a trigger like that of a rifle. Point to note: crossbows were around well before the rifle came onto the scene.
Using a crossbow an archer simple has to draw the string (or cock the crossbow) take aim and fire. Whereas with the traditional bow, an archer has to aim and shoot fairly quickly as the longer he takes to aim the more tired his arm will get and the less accurate his shot will be. This is mostly due to the strength and skill required to use a traditional bow. Whereas this problem is not encountered with a crossbow.
Two factors determine the amount of energy a bow can hold;Its draw weight and draw length: the bow's overall strength depends on how hard it is for you to pull the string and how far back you are able to pull it. Although there are several factors that affect its draw weight and length, i.e. size, shape, density. All of the physics concepts that apply to bows apply to crossbows as well. Larger crossbows that a person aims from the shoulder are more powerful than smaller, handheld crossbows.
Most crossbows have the same basic loading and cocking mechanism:
1. Place the crossbow stirrup on the ground.
2. Put your foot on the stirrup and firmly cock the bow.
3. Grab the string with both hands and pull upwards towards yourself. But luckily some new crossbows come with a cocking mechanism using cranks and such to make cocking easier.
4. Pull the string all teh way to the lock mechanism. Once cocked, you should hear a click before releasing the string.
5. Place an arrow (or bolt) in the groove, making sure the end touches the string and one of the fletchings (feathers) should be in the groove.
6. Take aim, release the safety and pull the trigger to shoot. But remember a crossbow is not a toy its a weapon. So dont point it at anyone you dont plan on shooting.
Many hunters still use crossbows today, although they are far more sophisticated than than their earlier counterparts. Modern crossbows use exceptionally strong lightweight metals as well as the addition of scopes and other such gadgets.
But in the end, its still a weapon and must be used with care.
Play safe now kids.
I can handle clouds, but cant fight with an eclipse.
10 October 2005
3 hours 6 min
never wait for the sales coz my size always sells out or most of the time they dont even do my size which is sooo annoying
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
10 October 2005
3 hours 6 min
HOW TO CHANGE A FLAT TYRE.....
call your dad
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
25 June 2005
2 weeks 5 days
When your car makes funny noise.
Call dad.
When you're lost.
Call dad.
When you have something heavy to carry.
Call dad.
If the tax/mobile/bank/union etc people are messing you about
Call dad.
If you want your brother to do something and he isnt listening to you.
Call dad.
When you've forgotten what petrol your car takes.
Call dad.
16 October 2006
27 weeks 16 hours
I know how to cook toast? Does that count.....
He who sacrifices his conscience to ambition, burns a picture to obtain the ashes!
7 January 2006
13 weeks 11 hours
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/27/dining/27sour.html
Ayatullah Khomeini rightly declared America as the Greatest Satan. www.tehrantimes.com
6 November 2006
1 year 17 weeks
You can do this in 5 minutes.
Loosen the nuts
If you leave this until the car is lifted the wheels may rotate and it is harder.
Prize off the hubcap, maybe using as a wedge the wrench end of the big spanner that should be in the boot if you need to stay fairly presentable.
Use the spanner to loosen the circle of nuts. If you aren't strong or the nuts are tight, and if your shoes are OK for it, push on the wrench with the flat of your heel.
Lift the car
Get out the jack, place the flat underside on the ground and align the ridge with the edge of the car body. Place it just near the wheel towards the centre of the car. You will probably need to raise the jack a bit first (by rotating the handle or using the pump if it's a fancy jack) to get a good alignment. If it doesn't have a pump action this will also keep your knuckles off the ground when it comes to lifting the car.
Lift the car using the jack. This is quite easy so if it's your first time changing a tyre you get to feel like a pro with minimal effort.
Replace the tyre
Unscrew the nuts fully and remove them, using either the spanner or your fingers.
Lift off the tyre. Put on the new one.
Replace each nut and tighten them lightly, then again more tightly. This is so that you don't have the problem of one nut being really tight and the rest of tyre being at an angle, trust me.
Collapse and put away the jack and go round the nuts again making them as tight as you can.
Put the old tyre in the boot and show it to the garage the next day for a replacement tyre, which is mandatory.
Well done.
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The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)
24 June 2005
2 weeks 6 days
How to download stuff using Torrents!
Torrents are basicly files that contain directions for your computer on where such a such File is on the internet which you wish to download. All you have to do is search for a torrent via a search engine (i.e. Google) download the torrent (they're usually very small in size so shouldnt take long to download).
1. Using a search engine locate the file you wanna download. For example if i was a HUGE Beethoven fan and wanted Beethovens 5th Symphony, i'd search google for "Beethovens 5th Symphony torrent".
2. Once located download onto computer. This is not the actual file but it will help locate it.
3. Inorder to download the file you want you're going to need a Torrent application. These are usually free applications which you can download and use (i would recommend uTorrent or Azureus). Once you have one of these, use it to open the torrent file you downloaded earlier.
4. The application will take the instructions in the torrent file telling it where to find the files. It will basicly connect to other people who have the file on their computer and extract pieces to your computer where it will put it all togeather.
5. Sit back and relax, in a few moments (depending on the size of the file) the file you want will have downloaded onto your computer for you to enjoy.
You want to make a puzzle
you don't have the pieces
you download something that finds you the pieces
it retrieves the pieces and puts them together for you
you get the puzzle!
(puzzle=downloaded thingy)
Be careful in what you download as sometimes the torrent is a fake and you're downloading something else entirely... or even something harmful. I recommend you scan each file using a good anti-virus program before opening.
Although torrents are used primarily to download illegal copies of movies, music albums, books and software... that does not mean i in anyway condone such behaviour. Oh to be a Pirate. Drink up me 'eartys!
Unlike peer-to-peer software (i.e. Napster, Kazaa) have been royally screwed over
by the big companies for copy right infringement... there has yet to be a successful case against anyone using torrents... they're just alot harder to track. 
I can handle clouds, but cant fight with an eclipse.
10 October 2005
3 hours 6 min
took me 3 hours with the help of my big sis and mum lol
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
2 August 2005
2 weeks 2 days
Tut tut tut
what happened to all the independant woman thing now eh!!
How to pass a degree....work hard, but importantly, chill
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
25 June 2005
2 weeks 5 days
Even independent women know their limitations and depend on others when desperate.
I dont consider myself 'independent'. Theres a lot I depend on my family for.
10 October 2005
3 hours 6 min
actually i had been buggin my dad to show me for ages but he said not to worry and that he will always be around to do it coz its too hard. (he was right well about the nuts anyway, had to literally jump on the spanner coz they were proper tight).
When i did get a flat tyre he was half way across the world.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
24 June 2005
2 weeks 6 days
How to recognise signs of a stroke.
1. Numbness on one side of the body.
2. Be wary of sudden loss of speech or difficulty speaking.
3. Take note of any vision problems i.e. dimness, complete loss of vision.
4. Be alert to sudden, severe, unexplained headaches, dizziness, loss of coordination or balance without apparent cause.
If a stroke victime can get medical attention within 3 hours the effects can be reversed.
Everyday people can recognise a stroke by asking 3 simple questions:
1. Ask the individual to smile. Take note in any muscular irregularities when they try.
2. Ask them to raise both arms.
3. Ask them to speak a simple sentence coherently e.g. "It is raining outside".
Remembering these 3 questions can help doctors diagnose and treat him quickly.
Its better to know them and not need them, than to need them and not know them.
I can handle clouds, but cant fight with an eclipse.
21 November 2006
4 hours 17 sec
HOW TO WALK ON A TIGHTROPE
1) Tie a piece of string really tightly between your sofa and the radiator
2) Practice walking along it for 5 hours a day every day for 8-10 years, even if its sunny outside and all your friends are in the park.
3) Lose the will to live
4) Congratulations...you can now join the Circus.
Winter is the Springtime of the Muslim. Because Allah (swt) has made the nights long for worship, and the days short for fasting!
24 June 2005
3 hours 7 min
Does anyone know how to do an analytical framework?
24 June 2005
2 min 26 sec
analytical framework of what?
I am sure mathematicians, phsycologists, engineers etc will have a different answer...
The enemy of my enemy is my... enemy.