I married young

These days, young married couples are an anomaly. In pop culture, they usually get married at a surprise wedding: Think Andy and April inParks and Recreation or Jessa and Thomas-John(who’s not really young) in Girls. Before the bouquet toss, viewers were counting down to the divorce episode, probably because celebrities have taught us that it won’t last. Britney Spears’ first marriage was annulled within hours, and she racked up a second divorce before age 26. At age 22, Jessica Simpson scored a reality television show about her marriage to Nick Lachey: The couple divorced three seasons (er, years) later. Is it any wonder the world scoffed at Miley Cyrus’ plan for three weddings?

And pop culture tracks reality. Only 21 percent of millennials (those ages 18-29) are married, and the median age for marriage is the highest in generations: almost 27 for women and 29 for men. By comparison, 29 percent of Generation X, 42 percent of Boomers, and 54 percent of the Silent Generation (born 1928 through 1945) were married by that age, according to a 2010 Pew Research Survey.

According to Pew, 60 percent of unmarried men and women want to tie the knot. But they just aren’t in any hurry. Marriage these days signals that you’ve figured out how to be a grown-up. You’ve played the field, backpacked Europe, and held a bartending gig to supplement an unpaid internship. You’ve “arrived,” having finished school, settled into a career path, bought a condo, figured out who you are, and found your soul mate. The fairytale wedding is your gateway into adult life. But in my experience, this idea about marriage as the end of the road is pretty misguided and means couples are missing out on a lot of the fun.

Read the rest here 

The different in considering marrying young and applying it to Muslims is that not marrying young is not in a vacuum.

People do not live monogamous lives and then at an average age of 29 get married.

They have relationships from a early to late teens, and then on average get married at 29 on average. So while marriage is late, relationships etc are not.

So if a Muslim gets married at an average age of 29, and lives how a Muslim is supposed to til then, the muslim is years behind on the lifescale.

I was reading an article the other day - men who father children in their 30's are actually considered "older" fathers (and the older you are, the greater chanse of genetic abnormalities in the offspring).

Are "Marrying young" and having a serious committed relationship at that age two totally different things?

"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.

 

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So if a Muslim gets married at an average age of 29, and lives how a Muslim is supposed to til then, the muslim is years behind on the lifescale.
True

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I was reading an article the other day - men who father children in their 30's are actually considered "older" fathers (and the older you are, the greater chanse of genetic abnormalities in the offspring).
But it's quite common for fathers to be older these days, I think as they decide to have children after they're stable and lived a bit. The average age of new mothers has gone up too. 

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Are "Marrying young" and having a serious committed relationship at that age two totally different things?
I don't get the question :S

"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi

"you" made a good point abt the previous relationship.

havent read all article but yeah, the idea that marriage shld only happen after "you've arrived" is rubbish. how lonely to do that whole journey on your own. i dont see it that way. life's a journey, comes a point where its interesting to have someone along.

 

kids is another issue. i wld say 30 is the beginning of being "too old" to have kids.  the kid you have at 30 might be fine, but thats usually not the only kid you'll have. you'll end up with having kids at 42 and when they're so full of energy and need a role model..well..they dont have that...

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Looking To See wrote:
 kids is another issue. i wld say 30 is the beginning of being "too old" to have kids.  the kid you have at 30 might be fine, but thats usually not the only kid you'll have. you'll end up with having kids at 42 and when they're so full of energy and need a role model..well..they dont have that...

I thought you were going to talk about genetically not being good when I read the begining of that sentence. 

Islamically speaking, and if we were to follow the example of the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam (Peace and Blessings be upon him) we should still be healthy and energetic at 42, provided we don't have any other illnesses that are out of our control - so basically through living a healthy life style. I read about an 80 something yr old running the London marathon last weekend!!

"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi

you've actually got a point mashaaAllah. i wld say so, better to have kids early then to hope to be healthy and have no other illness later in life lol.

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?