Why?

wat i dont get is why most guyz are OBSESSED with sex,
wat i dont understand is why muslim TEENAGERZ are obsessed with havin a boyf/girlf
-Whhy dont they jus get married? like propa muslimzz-

i dont get why every person in the world has a need 2 be wanted nd why do muslims alwaiiiz hav buyf/girlf even if they know that it will probably destroy their fam with it ...its jus dumb all the excuses i hav heard are bullshit. the most common excuse i hav heard is "i jus wanted 2 be loved"
thats a bit confusin seeing as your family love u dont ya think?

i think that some ppl are jus thick.

i aint tellin u ppl that 15/16 ppl shuld get married they shuld jus get they're rishtha/nikah done then they can do wateva they want ... OVIOUSLY!

Comments

ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE wrote:
How frequent is this acid-throwing, anyway? Are you basing it on like one/few cases?

In 1996, there were 47 reported cases of acid violence.

In 1997, the number rose to 130.

In 1998, there were over 200 reported cases. It is highly likely that the number of actual cases is considerably higher.

In 1999 the Acid Survivors Foundation started to collect data and in its first year documented 139 known cases. It is highly likely that the number of actual cases is higher.

In 2000 226 cases were documented by the Acid Survivors Foundation.

In 2001, 343 cases were documented.

In 2002 the highest number recorded as 484 which had been lower a little bit in the last year.

In 2003, the number was 410 cases.

Bearing in mind that the above stats are just reported cases in Bangladesh.

You wrote:
The general idea that "the west is an illusion,but if you look deeper, people are actually treated worse"... its not true.

Ofcourse it is an illusion. You loose the right to control your own kids, you get locked up. The western world plays a psychological game, it seems you have greater control of you life when actually you don't or even if you do it's not always in the best interest of you religious beliefs. Oh yeah and one more point, the acid throwing business does'nt take place in western countries cos they still have some type of law and order, but that does not make it a perfect islamic state...

I am not defending any current so called muslim states, imo their are'nt any in the world any more. True shariah law like in the old days is what I would prefer to any liberal modern day states...

If I ever have to kill for something, it would be for, "A woman"
If I ever have to kill something it would have to be, "A woman"

MakeMeRawr_8TeenF wrote:
You wrote:
People can grow and change as they age, but they can grow together as opposed to alone.

Feeling ready and more is influenced by culture and the people around you. I read somewhere that the average age of people getting married in the UK is currently 29 and I see that as a bad thing - probably worse for Muslims if that becomes the norm for us.

On the other hand, in the non Muslim norm in the UK, people are dating and more by the late teens, sometimes even in long term relationships. Is that really so different? (well, it probably is, but should it be?)

And yeah that is sooo valid because obviously in Muslim countries where they do often get married very young, women are generally treated so amazingly well.
And I didn't say people should get married at 29, I just think it's stupid to say that just because a 14 or 15 year old has sexual urges you just tell them to get married.

And I can't believe I'm having to explain this but the reason why dating is and should be different to marriage is because to most people Marriage is seen as a commitment and (at the time) permanent, whereas dating is temporary or potentially permanent. If marriage was seen as less important or significant then yeah, people probably would get married at 15 just so they could legitimately have sex and then divorce when they realised they werent actually compatible with someone after theirs and the other person changed a little as they grew older and more or less knowledgeable.

To be honest I think Rawry is right. Marriage is different (or at least it should be) and it needs to be properly understood and appreciated for it to MEAN anything. Marriage in Islam is not just the physical act of singing a paper it's what follows after it: how you treat each other, how you work and live together and how you raise kids.

Coming to Sapphire's original post I think that the reason why SOME (not all) guys are obsessed with sex is because of the pressure around them. It's glorified as good and the media tells you that unless you're doing this you're not good enough.

You know, Sapphire, I actually remember thinking exactly what you were thinking when I was young, well your age (I'd like to think I am still young). The reason I think is because people lack the knowledge or understanding; not only of Islam but also the benefits and the wisdom behind it. I think if we can understand that then we've got a home run. If I had understood the uncertainty and lack of direction that follows "trial and error relationships" then I think my Iman would have been alot stronger at school, it took a bit of knocking and searching to get there but it happened, Alhamdulillah. Wink

Ma'am, it's really important to not to lose your temper or be judgemental of these people; otherwise you'll just push them away and be going against Islam.
Allah (swt) says in the Quran: "Had you [O Muhammad] not been gentle towards them, been harsh and hard hearted towards them, then they would have surely dispersed from you." (Sura 3 [Ali Imran]:159)

It's human nature to want to be loved. Intimately and sexually, as well as platonically. It seems as though you have a loving family right? I hope you're grateful for that and treat them well. But not everyone does, unfortunately.
The love you expect from your husband or wife, is different from that of friends and family. I mean the love and understanding I'd hope for from a future wife, would be a "different" sort that I would want from the bros, friends or my family; because that's how we've been made.

Some people make the naive mistake in thinking that after having sex they'll fall in love and everything will be nice and rosy. Not the reality, I'm afraid; because people burn out, they change and they reveal their true (lesser) self.
Even when marriage is concerned things need to be approached with wisdom and the lovely thing that we've all been blessed with: our mind.
Having ultra high expectations and/or not talking about your rights and responsibilities and not talking to people who know the person is a recipe for potential disaster, which follows in the form of rowing, seperating and divorce.

I think that'll be all for one post (I don't want to write a book just yet! LOL!). I hope that was helpful to you, Sapphire. Smile

“Before death takes away what you are given, give away whatever there is to give.”

Mawlana Jalal ud Din Rumi

So the acid incidents aren't one-offs. Fool

Btw, I like the light provided by The Lamp. Blum 3 Smile

"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi

love The Lamp's post!

about the acid-attack: that's nearly one everyday!
why do they do it? (or is this a new topic?)

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE wrote:
So the acid incidents aren't one-offs. Fool

Btw, I like the light provided by The Lamp. Blum 3 Smile

+1

"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest"

I'm incredibly humbled by that, people. I really am.

I'd love to know what Sapphire thinks and how she is and whether that's helped ease her mind

“Before death takes away what you are given, give away whatever there is to give.”

Mawlana Jalal ud Din Rumi

Ocean wrote:
I believe Shias Muslims came across this YEARS ago and hence even came up with a solution too...

Don't confuse the girl!

"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi

Ocean wrote:
ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE wrote:
Ocean wrote:
I believe Shias Muslims came across this YEARS ago and hence even came up with a solution too...

Don't confuse the girl!

If she knows how to read (CAREFULLY) she wouldn't get confused.

nope, you're adding spice to the sauce and thats just gona confuse her (And give her a hot throat)

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Pages