Advice needed, please! (Weddings)

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Seraphim wrote:
zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
ZDC are you on any sort of medication? ... you might want to consider it.

Yep, I forget to take my shot on my @rse, please help (Rolls down pants, and waits...)

Keep waiting. Inshallah by the grace of Allah (swt) im sure someone will help you... ¬_¬

(Takes out shotgun, takes aim... BANG) lol

AAAAAHHHHHH!! That was invigorating, one more please.... you missed the sweet spot...

Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul, which sometimes helps me and sometimes opposes me.
-Imam Al-Ghazali

Check again, i never miss.

Back in BLACK

Seraphim wrote:
Check again, i never miss.

You just did, even my big, green @rse you missed. Pity your wife wedding night, shooting miss and all.

Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul, which sometimes helps me and sometimes opposes me.
-Imam Al-Ghazali

zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
Check again, i never miss.

You just did, even my big, green @rse you missed. Pity your wife wedding night, shooting miss and all.

You might want to get your green @rse checked out... its not supposed to be green. Things might start falling off Lol Lol
And i just pity you full stop. Everything about you is pitiful mate.

Back in BLACK

Seraphim wrote:
zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
Check again, i never miss.

You just did, even my big, green @rse you missed. Pity your wife wedding night, shooting miss and all.

You might want to get your green @rse checked out... its not supposed to be green. Things might start falling off Lol Lol
And i just pity you full stop. Everything about you is pitiful mate.

Go check your eyes out, they all red and skew, that's why you're shooting miss.

Bye.

Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul, which sometimes helps me and sometimes opposes me.
-Imam Al-Ghazali

zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
Check again, i never miss.

You just did, even my big, green @rse you missed. Pity your wife wedding night, shooting miss and all.

You might want to get your green @rse checked out... its not supposed to be green. Things might start falling off Lol Lol
And i just pity you full stop. Everything about you is pitiful mate.

Go check your eyes out, they all red and skew, that's why you're shooting miss.

Bye.

you hurt me with your big words :roll:

Back in BLACK

zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
ZDC are you on any sort of medication? ... you might want to consider it.

Yep, I forget to take my shot on my @rse, please help (Rolls down pants, and waits...)

Dude, you really do scare me.

Love is a serious mental disease.

zdc wrote:
I hate weddings too,:(

Great, that makes 2 of us! I thought i was weird for not seeing the 'bright' side of it.

Love is a serious mental disease.

Seraphim wrote:
zdc wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
ZDC are you on any sort of medication? ... you might want to consider it.

Yep, I forget to take my shot on my @rse, please help (Rolls down pants, and waits...)

Keep waiting. Inshallah by the grace of Allah (swt) im sure someone will help you... ¬_¬

(Takes out shotgun, takes aim... BANG) lol

Please do not use Allah's name in situtations like so.

Love is a serious mental disease.

@Seraphim/Zdc,
Ok, this is clearly irrelevant. Just help me out!
What to do, what not to do.
What is a definite no-no?
What will put me in their good books.
Plus, this is going to be in Pakistan. So, I've pretty much heard about the....ahem...attitude to 'foreign women' in Pakistan. I want to fit in, and not be you know , what I actually am...until I get to Arabia/Egypt.
So help me out:

Love is a serious mental disease.

Isha Al-Maghribi wrote:
Great, that makes 2 of us! I thought i was weird for not seeing the 'bright' side of it.

There will always be concerns, fears of the unknown etc.

At the same time it can be the making of something better.

PS, bnack onto what different cultures call marriage and nikah etc... someone said to me today that is aab cultures, the marriage is when the ride leaves her house for the new one? something in indian culture called "rukhsati" (or departure to those of us who prefer english).

"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.

You wrote:
Isha Al-Maghribi wrote:
Great, that makes 2 of us! I thought i was weird for not seeing the 'bright' side of it.

There will always be concerns, fears of the unknown etc.

At the same time it can be the making of something better.

PS, bnack onto what different cultures call marriage and nikah etc... someone said to me today that is aab cultures, the marriage is when the ride leaves her house for the new one? something in indian culture called "rukhsati" (or departure to those of us who prefer english).

Yep, i think that is right.
But, i am the WORST person to ask about cultures. I can barely understand my own.

Love is a serious mental disease.

Culture is not a solid thing. It is not something that is constant. It ebbs and flows and you make your own.

"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.

You wrote:
Culture is not a solid thing. It is not something that is constant. It ebbs and flows and you make your own.

right.
So do you have any DO'S/DON'T/S???????
I really don't want to make my family or my self look bad.

Love is a serious mental disease.

Easiest way is to let them take the lead? they will have some ideas etc.

Or are they leaving all the planning to you too?

"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.

You wrote:
Easiest way is to let them take the lead? they will have some ideas etc.

Or are they leaving all the planning to you too?

Arab wedding, and the one In Britain are sorted.
But, the Pakistan one is not.
I mean to do my Hijaab, i wear like billions of different layers of scraves, and pins and accessories, yeah, and Mother-in-law was like "why can't you wear one simple piece of fabric?"
And, then this other time, (Ok, this may be a bit inappropriate); I'm a major fan of Michael Jackson.So I had this Black/Silver gothic Jilbab with MJ's portrait on the back, and then she was like "You've got a Man's picture on your body?!"
... Cut me some slack, The poor man's in Barzakh! And, that's my style, I'm not going to change it for anyone.
...
Oh,and once she told me to wear my hijaab 'loosely'. I din't really understand what she meant. And 'he' told me how. and it was like you know, how girls in Afghansistan wear it? So she saw my hair. And she told me to dye my hair black! Yes, black! I believe in naturalness. Jet Black is lovely; but it would so NOT be me. and, why should we perfect Allah's creation???

I asked her "why? what is wrong with my hair?"( but in am more respectful, polite manner). She says "white girls are considered as loose women in Pakistani culture."
I'm not even (what she'd class ) white!
I mean, all this I'm told about their culture, is it even true???? Because some things are unbelievably what?!

Love is a serious mental disease.

Ok, sister is coming from Sweden today. And tomorrow we are heading to Pakistan.
So wish me luck and Insha'Allah people will like me.
...
Thank you for your advice
Is there any other information I will need (besides taking a lot of sun block?)
...
PS!!!!
Good news! My brother's ladyfriend said she'll come with us! And she's of Pakistani origin. So she'll be a great help!

Love is a serious mental disease.

Have you ever been to Pakistan?

 

s.b.f wrote:
Have you ever been to Pakistan?

no, lol, i wouldn't be asking otherwise...

Love is a serious mental disease.

Oh!!! Inshallab all goes well and YOU HAVE A GREAT TIME!!

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

Ok, I don’t know where to start!
This experience was just traumatic, if you like. the wedding was total….hellish . The wedding was not segregated! They totally do not accept piercing or tattoos.

The mother-in-law chose the outfit, I told her “Please, do not make it anything where too much is on show”. She was like “Of course, of course. Like I would do that.” Then next thing you know, she gave me the attire to try it on. I was about to flip my lid, It was like a heavy skirt , like really heavy, and then a stupid small-top like thing, That just covered the bosom. The whole abdomen was on show, and the neck could be seen and the arms; nothing was covered. I tried to be polite about it, and I told her ‘no chance’. She was like “Ok, then.“ But, I think she told my Mother; as my Mother came to me and was like “Isha, it’s only one day. Do it for your mother-in-law.” I was like “No, Mother. It makes me look like a slapper!” and then came one of her looks “Yallah, Just do it, will you!” At this point I thought it would be segregated, so I didn’t really think it was such a big issue.

The day came, and (don’t tut, please!), but , you know, everyone has tattoos. And, as the abdomen was visible, they could see my tattoo. I got it done in Arabia, and it was just a phrase in Arabic; it was a ring wrapped around that area, and I got like so many death stares! Mother-in-law was like “what the hell is that?! I am ashamed, you’ve brought the death of me! And, you have belly-piercing! Arabic words! Words of the Qur'an!” She started touching her ears constantly and saying “Allah Astaghfir!” (Fear Allah!) It was Arabic, not words from the Holy Qur'an.I didn’t really think it was a big deal. It wasn’t even visible like most of the time.
And, hello, gender discrimination! My brother’s tattoos come from his shoulder blade to his left cheek; which was like totally visible!And, they had more inappropraite ones than me; And, they would sometimes walk topless; but, no’ one said anything to them!
And I tried to move the veil-like thing over my stomach and women would come and give long stares. I smiled back, sweetly.
One girl even pulled my skirt kind of up and pointed at the tattoo around my ankle and she said something to her Mother, and her mother grabbed one side of her Hijaab and covered her mouth with it, and started talking behind it. Was it honestly a really big deal?! Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill, geez.
And, mother-in-law didn’t even let me wear a hijaab! Fury. I told her, she started laughing “who wears scarf on their wedding day?!” I raised an eyebrow and walked out. My cousin was like “Stop being a diva.”
I was not being a diva. Just fighting for my rights. Yallah! And, that was only the wedding problem.

Love is a serious mental disease.

The airport was a bedlam!
Well, they stopped on Benyameen. The funny thing, is that he gets stopped like in most airports. Gid knows why. But, he does get stopped a lot.
And, he had to like take his jacket off. He did. He had to take his top off.He didn't. He kept refusing. And, we were waiting there for like several hours! So frustrating! And, then we had to beg him to take it off. He is very sensitive about his skin...and stuff. And then he was like "You're stopping me because I'm white, I know you are!"
"Maybe, it's because it says "Jandi-Allah"( soldier of Allah) on your neck, maybe?" the other twin says.
Ben starts smiling, "do they think I'm a terrorist?"
And, then I said "Isn't that Muja-hi-deen??? Justifiers of Islam?"
"Jihad, and all that", brother says.
Oh yeah. Whilst we were talking, the officer says "how come you know so much about terrorists?"
"Everyone does" was my argument.
Then Ben and Deen cleared their names out, and relief!
Then the officer was nice and apologised for his misunderstanding; and started giving lectures about terrorism and how it is "so wrong, and will not do justice for anyone", he was just basically saying all this stuff about Al-Qaida, etc and Bin Laden.
I got really annoyed! Yes, they're bad people, but give them a chance to justify themselves! So, my big mouth opens and I say "there's nothing wrong with that. One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter!"

And, they all look at me like "WTH! is she agreeing with terrorists?"
I get glares from the twins.

Love is a serious mental disease.

Isha Al-Maghribi wrote:
Ok, I don’t know where to start!
This experience was just traumatic, if you like. the wedding was total….hellish . The wedding was not segregated! They totally do not accept piercing or tattoos.

The mother-in-law chose the outfit, I told her “Please, do not make it anything where too much is on show”. She was like “Of course, of course. Like I would do that.” Then next thing you know, she gave me the attire to try it on. I was about to flip my lid, It was like a heavy skirt , like really heavy, and then a stupid small-top like thing, That just covered the bosom. The whole abdomen was on show, and the neck could be seen and the arms; nothing was covered. I tried to be polite about it, and I told her ‘no chance’. She was like “Ok, then.“ But, I think she told my Mother; as my Mother came to me and was like “Isha, it’s only one day. Do it for your mother-in-law.” I was like “No, Mother. It makes me look like a slapper!” and then came one of her looks “Yallah, Just do it, will you!” At this point I thought it would be segregated, so I didn’t really think it was such a big issue.

The day came, and (don’t tut, please!), but , you know, everyone has tattoos. And, as the abdomen was visible, they could see my tattoo. I got it done in Arabia, and it was just a phrase in Arabic; it was a ring wrapped around that area, and I got like so many death stares! Mother-in-law was like “what the hell is that?! I am ashamed, you’ve brought the death of me! And, you have belly-piercing! Arabic words! Words of the Qur'an!” She started touching her ears constantly and saying “Allah Astaghfir!” (Fear Allah!) It was Arabic, not words from the Holy Qur'an.I didn’t really think it was a big deal. It wasn’t even visible like most of the time.
And, hello, gender discrimination! My brother’s tattoos come from his shoulder blade to his left cheek; which was like totally visible!And, they had more inappropraite ones than me; And, they would sometimes walk topless; but, no’ one said anything to them!
And I tried to move the veil-like thing over my stomach and women would come and give long stares. I smiled back, sweetly.
One girl even pulled my skirt kind of up and pointed at the tattoo around my ankle and she said something to her Mother, and her mother grabbed one side of her Hijaab and covered her mouth with it, and started talking behind it. Was it honestly a really big deal?! Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill, geez.
And, mother-in-law didn’t even let me wear a hijaab! Fury. I told her, she started laughing “who wears scarf on their wedding day?!” I raised an eyebrow and walked out. My cousin was like “Stop being a diva.”
I was not being a diva. Just fighting for my rights. Yallah! And, that was only the wedding problem.

WOW! What a way to begin married life eh ! Lol.

Didn't your mother in law see the tattoo when you tried on the dress in the first place? Weird. Why would they embarrass you ON your wedding day INFRONT of EVERYONE about a tattoo... when they clearly don't mind you wearing short tops they care about a lousy tattoo? lol that's weird!

Hows everyone now in the family?Where did u go for the honeymoon?? And congrats for the wedding!!!

Your own soul is nourished when you are kind; it is destroyed when you are cruel.

Bijou wrote:
Isha Al-Maghribi wrote:
Ok, I don’t know where to start!
This experience was just traumatic, if you like. the wedding was total….hellish . The wedding was not segregated! They totally do not accept piercing or tattoos.

The mother-in-law chose the outfit, I told her “Please, do not make it anything where too much is on show”. She was like “Of course, of course. Like I would do that.” Then next thing you know, she gave me the attire to try it on. I was about to flip my lid, It was like a heavy skirt , like really heavy, and then a stupid small-top like thing, That just covered the bosom. The whole abdomen was on show, and the neck could be seen and the arms; nothing was covered. I tried to be polite about it, and I told her ‘no chance’. She was like “Ok, then.“ But, I think she told my Mother; as my Mother came to me and was like “Isha, it’s only one day. Do it for your mother-in-law.” I was like “No, Mother. It makes me look like a slapper!” and then came one of her looks “Yallah, Just do it, will you!” At this point I thought it would be segregated, so I didn’t really think it was such a big issue.

The day came, and (don’t tut, please!), but , you know, everyone has tattoos. And, as the abdomen was visible, they could see my tattoo. I got it done in Arabia, and it was just a phrase in Arabic; it was a ring wrapped around that area, and I got like so many death stares! Mother-in-law was like “what the hell is that?! I am ashamed, you’ve brought the death of me! And, you have belly-piercing! Arabic words! Words of the Qur'an!” She started touching her ears constantly and saying “Allah Astaghfir!” (Fear Allah!) It was Arabic, not words from the Holy Qur'an.I didn’t really think it was a big deal. It wasn’t even visible like most of the time.
And, hello, gender discrimination! My brother’s tattoos come from his shoulder blade to his left cheek; which was like totally visible!And, they had more inappropraite ones than me; And, they would sometimes walk topless; but, no’ one said anything to them!
And I tried to move the veil-like thing over my stomach and women would come and give long stares. I smiled back, sweetly.
One girl even pulled my skirt kind of up and pointed at the tattoo around my ankle and she said something to her Mother, and her mother grabbed one side of her Hijaab and covered her mouth with it, and started talking behind it. Was it honestly a really big deal?! Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill, geez.
And, mother-in-law didn’t even let me wear a hijaab! Fury. I told her, she started laughing “who wears scarf on their wedding day?!” I raised an eyebrow and walked out. My cousin was like “Stop being a diva.”
I was not being a diva. Just fighting for my rights. Yallah! And, that was only the wedding problem.

WOW! What a way to begin married life eh ! Lol.


I know,right?

Bijou wrote:

Didn't your mother in law see the tattoo when you tried on the dress in the first place? Weird. Why would they embarrass you ON your wedding day INFRONT of EVERYONE about a tattoo... when they clearly don't mind you wearing short tops they care about a lousy tattoo? lol that's weird!

Hows everyone now in the family?Where did u go for the honeymoon?? And congrats for the wedding!!!

No, she didn't see it. I checked it on my own. But, I thought they've seen my brothers' , so they won't have a problem with me. Guess I was wrong....

Oh, Gosh! Honeymoon. My Mother's saying Parandegan?In Iran? Heard of it?
You wouldn't relate Romantic with Iran, but there you go!
Apparently, it's like the most romantic place ever.
..
It hasnt happened yet, after the other 2 wedding functions. I'm not a 'honeymooney' person, so I don't know. People say 'Work hard, play hard.'But I like to work hard,not play hard.

Love is a serious mental disease.

Isha Al-Maghribi wrote:
Ok, I don’t know where to start!
This experience was just traumatic, if you like. the wedding was total….hellish . The wedding was not segregated! They totally do not accept piercing or tattoos.

...
I was not being a diva. Just fighting for my rights. Yallah! And, that was only the wedding problem.

:shock: Fool

"How many people find fault in what they're reading and the fault is in their own understanding" Al Mutanabbi

WELCOME BACK ISHA!!!

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

ThE pOwEr Of SiLeNcE wrote:
Isha Al-Maghribi wrote:
Ok, I don’t know where to start!
This experience was just traumatic, if you like. the wedding was total….hellish . The wedding was not segregated! They totally do not accept piercing or tattoos.

...
I was not being a diva. Just fighting for my rights. Yallah! And, that was only the wedding problem.

:shock: Fool

?

Love is a serious mental disease.

Lilly wrote:
WELCOME BACK ISHA!!!

Tashkor!"

Love is a serious mental disease.

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