Do we Have to get married???

Salam,
Can someone plz help me out? i was wonderin da other day whether we HAVE 2 get married in order to be a complete muslim. Cos my older sis don't wanna get married either cos of all da probs dat occur in marriage especially wit an uneducated guy from Pakistan. instead she says best live happy on ur own practicing ur deen away from any stress or worry. & da other day i joked 2 her dat both of us wil live 2gether wit mum/dad & care 4 dem rather dan getin married. Later wen i was alone i began 2 tink seriously abt da possibility of not getin married. cos if u can control ur desires & not commit sin is it allowed not to get married and therefore avoid any stress or problems dat occur later in life in marriage between families.

Salaam

According to Islam, marriage completes half your deen.

However, Marriage is not obligatory for everyone.

It is obligatory (Fardh) if a person fears he/she will commit unlawful acts if he/she doesn’t marry.

It is strongly recommended if the person can afford it and does not fear falling into sin.

It can be haraam (forbidden) if the person knows with certainty that he/she will cause harm to their partner….or will not be able to fulfill marital duties.

It’s mubah (permissible) in other cases. And I know its makruh (disliked) in certain other cases but I can’t remember which ones… :oops:

In your sister’s case…only she can know which category she falls in. However, she should know that there is no marriage without consent….if she doesn’t want to get married to a guy from back home then that’s her wish. But what’s her view regarding guys from here?

Maybe she'll be happy marrying a guy that allows her to continue practsing Islam?

Wasalaam

i don't tink my sis wil mind getin married from here but it is a question of findin da right man & comin down 2 pleasin da family & parents. We've got relatives here in da UK but she dont fancy any of dem in her age range due 2 their past history. I gues she don't wanna get married out of da family either cos might upset parents even though my dad has told her get married to who u want as long as their a gud muslim. & here in UK its hard findin a gud practicin muslim who's ambitious with a clean history - which is wat she wants. so 4 da time bein she's totally off wit da marriage idea.
Out of Interest, wat do u tink abt da debate of getin married to ur 1st cousins? Do u tink its believable tat 1st cousin marriages increases da chance of the baby havin some kind of deformality. Cos da MP a lass from Keightley who brought up dis idea is known to be slightly prejudiced against asians.

Ya Allah Please forgive us all, & shower your blessings and mercy upon us all both Muslims and Non-Muslims, ISLAM IS THE BEST, ALLAH (SWT) IS GREAT, & MUHAMMAD (SAW) IS THE BEST OF ALL MANKIND!!!

nothing wrong with cousin marriages if u dnt have an issue with the person

good decent guys are few but they're not rare

ur sister is prob stressed out-I dont blame her

but its pointless being anti marraige-(says the one who has been accused of being a man hater :roll: )

I'm sure she'll find her Mr Right

"MuslimSisLilSis" wrote:

but its pointless being anti marraige-(says the one who has been accused of being a man hater :roll: )

Wat do you mean... accused? :twisted:

Back in BLACK

If you want to stay stagnated as a individual, it probably best not to get married. But i found in some case it only make the person more bitter in the future if they don't get married.

Marriage is all about growing as a individual, which is why it equate to half your deen. As with marriage you are undertaking much more new roles, the husband, the father, the provider and you taking the responsibility of others as well. It easy to live for yourself but it something esle when you helping other do so as well, same for women as well. It is sad too see how people seem kind of afraid of marriage but it kind of too be expected. It is a big commitment. But whatever happen in marriage, if you accept it too be a duty from Allah swt you will come out of it with blessing whether it last a long time or not.

"A true Muslim is thankful to Allah in prosperity, and resigned to His will in adversity."

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Salam

It is forbidden for any girl to marry a mouse. Which is why they suffer.

Married life is only for real men.

Mice should not get married and have more babies.

Omrow

"boxer01" wrote:

Out of Interest, wat do u tink abt da debate of getin married to ur 1st cousins? Do u tink its believable tat 1st cousin marriages increases da chance of the baby havin some kind of deformality. Cos da MP a lass from Keightley who brought up dis idea is known to be slightly prejudiced against asians.

There is a greater chance of the child inheriting a genetic disorder than those who don't get married with their 1st cousins. It is a long complicated genetics stuff which I won't bore you with, bottom line is anyone can have children with abnormality due to so many mutations (genetic changes) taking place within a persons DNA.

THROUGH LOVE all that is bitter will be sweet.
Through Love all that is copper will be gold.
Through Love all dregs will turn to purest wine.
Through Love all pain will turn to medicine.
Through Love the king will turn into a slave!

"Omrow" wrote:

Married life is only for real men.

And WHO is a REAL man

Please define.

marriage, isn't important is it?? well i dnt know but parents can't put up wiv this when their kids say tat they dnt want to marry n they think yep my kids turned in to a western now......but they dnt understand wat problem their kids are going through.........

"paki_gal" wrote:
marriage, isn't important is it?? well i dnt know but parents can't put up wiv this when their kids say tat they dnt want to marry n they think yep my kids turned in to a western now......but they dnt understand wat problem their kids are going through.........

marraige is important-unfortunatly

i tell my parents all the time that I aint geting married ever

but I dont mean it-they know I'm joking

Thnk u evry1 4 ur replies, dey hav been very helpful. Also as a newish member/user of this site can i jus say a big thnk u 2 those who hav established dis site & helped bring all these wonderful, intelligent & compassionate muslim bro's & sis's 2gether 2 help 1 another through their advice & knowledge. May Allah (SWT) continue 2 bless all da users. Ameen!

Ya Allah Please forgive us all, & shower your blessings and mercy upon us all both Muslims and Non-Muslims, ISLAM IS THE BEST, ALLAH (SWT) IS GREAT, & MUHAMMAD (SAW) IS THE BEST OF ALL MANKIND!!!

"boxer01" wrote:
Out of Interest, wat do u tink abt da debate of getin married to ur 1st cousins? Do u tink its believable tat 1st cousin marriages increases da chance of the baby havin some kind of deformality. Cos da MP a lass from Keightley who brought up dis idea is known to be slightly prejudiced against asians.
newsnight did a good peice on this recently:

[size=9]I NEVER WORE IT BECAUSE OF THE TALIBAN, MOTHER. I LIKE THE [b]MODESTY[/b] AND [b]PROTECTION[/b] IT AFFORDS ME FROM THE EYES OF MEN.[/size] [url=, X-Men[/url]

Salam

"MuslimSisLilSis" wrote:
WHO is a REAL man

Please define.

Smokes a cigar.

Can easily handle a big truck.

Definitely not a pram pusher.

He pays for everything. Never lets his woman pay.

Thinks for himself. Does not need girlie advice.

Does not tolerate too much salt.

Not a Wahhabi. They are idiots.

He is a lot like Seraph.

Loses his rag quarterly.

Omrow

A REAL man, is the one who can control his temper.

And smoking is a disgusting habit.

"MuslimSister" wrote:
And smoking is a disgusting habit.

I concur

"Omrow" wrote:
Salam

"MuslimSisLilSis" wrote:
WHO is a REAL man

Please define.

Smokes a cigar.

Can easily handle a big truck.

Definitely not a pram pusher.

He pays for everything. Never lets his woman pay.

Thinks for himself. Does not need girlie advice.

Does not tolerate too much salt.

Not a Wahhabi. They are idiots.

He is a lot like Seraph.

Loses his rag quarterly.

Omrow

I think he's being pesimistic and by REAL man he means 'a man in REALITY'

Gentleness and kindness were never a part of anything except that it made it beautiful, and harshness was never a part of anything except that it made it ugly.

Through cheating, stealing, and lying, one may get required results but finally one becomes

"Omrow" wrote:
Not a Wahhabi. They are idiots.
:evil: :x SadCray 2

What you put in the hearts of others; is what goes back into your own heart…

One more thing - and how could I forget this one: He loves God.

"Omrow" wrote:
One more thing - and how could I forget this one: He loves God.

he cant love God if he refuses to push prams

God does not like the proud

on a general note, can we stop saying stuff like that about God, The Beloved Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam (Peace and Blessings be upon him) and any other important people :?

God: who he hates, who he likes, other stuff we just presume (unless its backed up with Quranic quotes, Hadith ref numbers or Shaykh's lecture)

and i dont like some of the stuff Omrow says in regards to the Prophet (saw)......too many times he says controversial stuff regarding some of the prophets and ambhiya

even tho u may think ur ryt, its disprespectful to presume and make assumptions without any knowledge

if ya know what i mean..........basically, not reffering to the above comment, but can we all be a lil more careful when we mention the Lords name or his Beloved and what we attribute towards them?

The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.

Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.

ɐɥɐɥ

Salam

"Darth V-Hayder" wrote:
its disprespectful to presume and make assumptions without any knowledge

Kindly act on this advice.

Furbal knows what she is talking about.

Omrow

i was talking more about you

The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.

Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.

ɐɥɐɥ