''The social influence a peer group exerts on its individual members, as each member attempts to conform to the expectations of the group''
Examples; type of clothes you wear, how you dress, what you say/do, places to go.
Good or bad? Does it make or break an individual? Have you ever been in a similar situation, and how would you respond?
Peer Pressure. The good sort - that you might not encourage at the beginning until you realise its benefits. And the bad sort - that you sooner or later realise is having a negative effect upon you. Thumbs up for the good peer pressure.
Good peer pressure really is helpful. When you need a reminder, when you're doing something wrong or having a bit of a low time, you have people around you who won't stay quiet - They'll do their very best to help you to do the right thing and tell you straight way. That's a pretty healthy relationship.
With bad peer pressure, anyone could easily say 1) go ditch your current group of friends, 2) start fresh and then, 3) make your own new crew. But it's not exactly as easy as that. Many times you've spent a long while with this group and it's hard to move away and do such a thing.
When it isn't possible i think the best thing to do is to tell the people you're with what you're really thinking. If they understand you, they would realise that you are entitled to your own opinions, way of dress, acting, etc in the same way that they are.
If you talk to them about it, they could possibly change their minds or make compromises too. If they don't want to listen to you, aren't budging or taking into account anything that you have to say, well, let them be. If you feel strongly about something, stick to what you think is best and do what you like.
And if they are really really really having a bad effect on you, in my opinion i would leave the group. I would rather be alone, independent and doing my own thing than being with a bunch of people who are going to misguide me and ruin my core beliefs and all.
But that doesn't mean that you should start hating them, ignoring them or totally blanking them. Just set a good example to them and continue being kind, helpful and the rest of it. Just be you.
There's times in my life when i've realised that the people around me weren't good for me at all. I know it was late when i realised, but i did eventually get the message that my parents had been drumming into my mind since day one. And in this case the best decision that i did was to say goodbye. They weren't worth it.
After all, the people you hang around with are those that you are most likely to copy, behave and act like, so take a look around you and see who you've befriended.
Another important thing - Keep friends for the sake of Allah. Always make Dua and pray to Allah to keep you in the company of good people and those who earn His pleasure. Pray that you have relationships which bring you closer to your religion and pray that Allah gives them, as well as you, the true understanding of the deen and makes you gain the best out of any friendship.
Edit: I didn't actually realise how much i'd written but i hope it helps you, even if it's the slightest bit.
i mglad it didnt accidently got all deleted in a freak revvy accident...
anyway, quoting Hummus:
this above, required this emote:
also, i wouldnt say talk to your group of friend and tell them, it'd go something like that "euh..guys..i think you're a bad influence on me, what do you think? shall we sort each other out or..."
what i would do (and i guess did) is leave, found some other friends, they weren't "good" or anything,i just started hanging around with them more, and alhamdulillah they were better. if anyone in the original group really wants to keep the friendship going, they'll come and look for you, or it'll maybe give them that push they needed because they also felt the same.
i stayed in touch with my original group, mainly coz we were in the same form. but as a group, we didnt have the same things to talk abt or the same way of thinking.
sometimes you just got to move on. theres no problem, its just that you've changed.
always make duah to Allah to help you find good friends who will help you on the path to JAnnah. thats all you need.
have you heard the hadith of the perfumeseller and the blacksmith?
edit: and it seems that second group.. seems i've distanced myself from them... shrug... found myself some good friends in college. (Y)
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Im not really the type of person whose influenced by peer pressure. At least i dont think i am. I have been lucky in that i have pretty much had the same friends for the majority of my life. Ive known my best friend since nurseries and im very particular about who i call a friend. Ive kinda always followed my own path (and left a wave of destruction in my wake lol).
I remember when i first started university (and all my old friends were at different campus doing different things) so i was forced to stretch out and meet new people (i make it sound like im soo unsociable haha ... thats not the case. I assure you). And i remember i hung out with this one group for a like a day.They were chosen because we mostly had similar backgrounds. But on spending one day with them i knew this wouldnt work out. So I stopped hanging out with them and found other people (people i probably wouldnt have hung out with before... a classic case of dont judge a book by its cover) who were surprisingly more level headed.
But i guess we should all be aware that we are constantly judged for the company we keep. So we should be aware.
Back in BLACK
somehow what im about tosay and peer pressure are related. somehow.
you know how there's this saying that "God should be your bestfriend" and stuff like that.well it doesnt happen overnight? (wel i guess it could) but it's a hard thing to do, genuinely do. making God your best friend. through the experiences I've had, there were moments where i needed to talk (why do we need to talk..so weird and useless..) and i reviewed in my head all my acquaintances and there wasnt anyone available. for various reasons. but there wasnt anyone, and then there was God. well He was always around, but finally I realised. and that was a great moment.
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
We are all influenced and moulded by our surroundings.
Peer pressure is just one aspect of this that can sometimes be more felt and thus better combatted.
"For too long, we have been a passively tolerant society, saying to our citizens 'as long as you obey the law, we will leave you alone'" - David Cameron, UK Prime Minister. 13 May 2015.
This is a very vague question to answer, albeit interesting to think about! I have been a sucker on occasion, and at other times very firm in my particular convictions. [IMG]http://i44.tinypic.com/1692q1y.gif[/IMG]
I like that.
This idea of 'peer pressure' always struck me, mainly because I always (stupidly) believed that I would never find myself in such situations, but then again we're all influenced by our surroundings in some way or another. I don't think its right to tell anyone that they're a 'bad influence', because everyone perceives things differently. I don't know whether its do with becoming your own person, or just something you come across- but it's not easy to judge anyone based on what they do; it 'could' be that they're being influenced too.
Whether that makes sense or not, I have no idea. Of course friends play a massive role and they're the biggest source of anyone becoming influenced by certain stuff. Remaining adamant and strong in what you truly believe in is the best way forward.
Sorry if it was a vague question (?), I tried to put it in simple terms as I could lol.
Peer pressure occurs on those days when i'm on tribune till after midnight when i have an important exam the following morning. No regrets and it's not like i can help myself, lol.