Getting married young
Salaam, what is your opinion on getting married in order to stay away from haram actions?
I am a religious 18 year old muslim, i pray 5 times a day. the only thing that is damaging my imaan is the fitnah of women. I see women half naked outside on the streets and on tv everyday and its very hard to keep practising with so many distractions. My mum would let me get married to a gal in pakistan but my dad says that i shud do my degree first. What do u think?? jazaakallah
Im also worried about what my mates wud think if i ever got a wife
Forum
Getting married young
Angel β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 01:54
YOU TWO SOUND LIKE A MARRIED COUPLE π π LOL
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 01:58
pressure points people
Wooooh-saaaaa π
Getting married young
Medarris β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:00
LOL!
I AM enjoying this.
Getting married young
Sajid Iqbal β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:02
you for a TJ lover are one of the dummest person ive ever come across..
we all know you are tj, an obsessed deobandi..why are you in denial..are you ashamed of it..
its ok i wont tell anyone
what do they teach you at your madrassah... life and times of the telly tubbies... π
im chilled...dude..are you?
π
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:03
ur tellin me....
this is more fun than amir khan fight
get u 2 on tv i say! π
...and Medieval with a knockout Dua there!! Ed comes in with a dua aimed at the head.... π
Getting married young
Dave β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:04
Gentlemen... I really must stress the importance of taking a time out for some hugs in the hug thread.
It works!!!
Just ask Angel!
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:04
i need a hug.,.....wheres that thread ....im'a comin dave!
Getting married young
Medarris β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:10
again you demonstrate your secularist polluted brainwaves.
Madrassah is a place where people are given religious lessons - dars.
We dont consider tele tubbies or anything like that to be part of religion. We learn about a Holy Book, the Word of God whom we call ALLAH and the Book is called Quran. We learn about Holy Words uttered by Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam called MUHAMMAD SALALLAHU ALAYHI WA SALLAM. Then we learn about a special group of people who always remained in the company of the Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam and they are called Holy Sahabah which means Companions.
Then we also learn alot of other things but maybe you wouldnt understand them cos you understand about tinky winky and dipsy dont you? Well tinky winky are what we call childrens characters and are used to entertain children. In our madrassah we don teach about imaginary secular things like that but we learn about Hadrat Zayd's learning of Syriac, of Hadrat Aisha's memory and other things.
See in your mind you tried to make me angry by making a joke at madrassah. You have irrefutably proved my point, just to try and anger me you insult and mock at the madaris where Qaal ALLAH and Qaala Rasululllah salallahu alayhi wa sallam constantly resound; alas you bring destruction upon yourself by mocking at the schools where the inheritance of Prophethood is distributed.
tut tut tut. I am now feeling really sorry for you. In order to make me look small or provoke a reaction you mock at madaris. I am free from such a person.
Getting married young
Medarris β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:12
being deobandi doesnt make you tj. I dont think you know what tj is cos if u did then you would knw that being deobandi doesnt make you tj. showing ur ignorance AGAIN brother? i really advise you to refrain from posting so regularly, its affecting what little mental capacity you did have. bechara.
Take a rest, i hear the carribbean is good this time of year.
Getting married young
Dave β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:14
It's hurricane season actually...
But most of the time it's fabulous - check out the Keys and Puerto Rico!
Hey whatever happened to our muslim from Puerto Rico?
Cuul Guy?
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:16
yet again....Puerto Rico!!! :shock:
now now hayder....calm down!
you too dave π
Getting married young
Dave β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:26
ahhhh not that again!
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:32
Puerto Rica......aaaaaaaahhhhh Bliss!!
Getting married young
Dave β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:34
lol you said it buddy - put me in that picture, gimme a non-alco stawberry daiquiri, a sailboat and 10 minutes and that's what I call a life well spent.
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:40
Well theres one ingredient missin....
but dont want every1 to start lynching me π
Getting married young
You β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:43
If its the ingrediant I think you're gonna add, leave it in your imagination...
Its better there.
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 02:44
haha....u dont knw what i was thinkin off
unless you were tooo :shock:
Getting married young
yuit β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 12:36
Yeah they certainly make it lively again here. I love coming on here and watching these two grown men flirt with each other π
Getting married young
yuit β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 12:44
I actually a big fan of getting married young. I think that looking back, this may have been my biggest regret. As long as the person mature enough too know the importance of marriage then too me age doesn't matter, I know people who are younger then me that are much more mature then me. I think people in today environment have been condition to think that marriage should be left for mid 20, but in Islam, marriage is the basis that make the person, which is why it half your deen.
It seem people are not willing to struggle anymore and want to be set in a certain situation. I think struggle is good, I think if the brother knows the role of a husband, he should go and get married, there are quite a few people at Uni who are married at it never seem to affect them, infact it made them more focus as they had a reason and aim to get so they tried that little bit harder.
Getting married young
Medarris β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 14:26
MashaALLAH good post.
I agree with what has been written above.
''Nikah is my sunnah, so whoever leaves/discards my sunnah then he is not of me''
Also the importance of nikah can be gauged from the fact that 4 practices have been constantly practiced by all Prophets Holy alayhimus salaatu was salaam viz Hinna, Itr, Miswak, nikah. There are exceptions to these but in general ALL four are a practice of a jamaat of Ambiya alayhim salawtullah was salaam.
Those who are eager to marry, establish the first three and the fourth will inshaALLAH naturally follow.
Sayyidina Ibn Masud radhiyallahu anhu mentioned once to his students to the effect that if I were unmarried and had only 10 days left to live, even then I would consider marriage to be amongst one of my foremost duties. Imagine if we had 10 days left to live we would say sit in masjid and pray for those 10 days but Hadrat Ibn Masud radhiyallahu anhu regarded nikah so highly that he would have married in those remaining days.
Getting married young
Muslimbrother1 β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 17:18
actually ed, i dont chat to girls uneccasarily unlike most guys my age, i dont flirt , smoke , drink or anythin like that. I pray 5 times day, study the quran, respect my parents and try to be a good muslim.
I understand where u are comin from , alot of young people nowadays have abandoned islam and follow their own desires shamelessly. the reason im thinkin about gettin married is because of the shameless women who walk around outside half naked trying to get peoples fone numbers (even muslim girls). May Allah subhanuwattallah keep the true believers safe from temptation.
medievalist u make sum very good points mashallah
Getting married young
Muslimbrother1 β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 17:32
"Three groups of people Allah obliged Himself to help them: Mujahid in the cause of Allah, a worker to pay his debt, and the one who wants to marry to live a chaste life". (Tirmidhi)
Getting married young
MuslimSisLilSis β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 17:48
go on Ed...
Your the man
I'd big u up more but then SOMEONE might start to accuse me of going into cheerleader mode :roll:
Getting married young
Dave β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 17:51
Yizzy Yazzy
Yizzy Yazzy
oy oy oy
The Ed is right
and he's our boy!
Gooooooooo ED!
YAAAAAAAY
*kick*
YAAAAAAAY
Getting married young
MuslimSister β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 20:13
Salaam
Maturity and the sense of responsibility in my opinion are vital pre-requisites for marriage.
Guys become interested in girls from the age of 13/4β¦they need to learn self controlβ¦not married off ASAP.
Marriage is not always the be all and end all.
How many teenage boys are in a position to support and look after a wife?
Wasalaam
Getting married young
Angel β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 20:40
Struggle is good and it also goes to show how much faith one has in Allah (swt) but i think for generations to come, their way of thinking is set that they want an easy life and them not havin basic islamic values means they are not willing to have patience. I feel those ppl who marry young and aren't financially stable can lead to their marriage being ruined, many girls nowadays like to spend money, even waste money and if they feel their husband aint providin them with it they wont like it and some may kick a fuss. One has to also be prepared mentally and has to be mature to go into a marriage, which is a really really big step which i personally believe many 18 yr olds are definitely not ready for!
Getting married young
Sirus β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 21:52
i gotta wait for the two infront of me b4 my turn :evil:
Getting married young
yuit β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 22:48
I feel your pain Hayder. I also agree with you Angel, that why it important to get married to someone on the same wavelength, so a common understanding can be developed. If you intention and deed are right Allah swt will help you a lot with your search for a wife.
"Women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity "(Quran 24:26)
On the topic as a whole. I find it funny that people used their own insecurity too put someone off marriage, now the person has said that he mature enough and he seem well verse in his religion. In my opinion we should be asking him constructive question rather then just being a critic. Now, too me it does seem that too much secular thinking in term of marriage. Now if someone is getting married for the good of their islam, then he will be able to turn his shortcoming into positives. We can always look on the negative in all aspect as Ed has done in this case, but if doing that we shouldnβt stop at these young people, let look at marriage as a whole and let used that as a reason not to get married at all, because of late it hasnβt been very successful. Medevial has been really good on the subject. Plus the brother involve has come with a very important hadith, which we should all pay more intention too. Three groups of people Allah obliged Himself to help them: Mujahid in the cause of Allah, a worker to pay his debt, and the one who wants to marry to live a chaste life".(Tirmidhi)
We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power."
Volume 7, Book 62, Number 4: Sahih Bukhari, Book 62:
Getting married young
Medarris β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 22:59
Yet another excellent post by Brother Yuit on this topic.
Muslim Brother it is apparent to us that ALLAH hs granted you wisdom, mashaALLAH you are striving in establishing salah, you fear that protecting yourself from fitnah may not be in you, you are ready for marriage with intention to protect yourself and your deen.
Brother accept my congratulations for such qualities in a young muslim today are rare indeed. May ALLAH further you in islam and accept you for service to deen.
Again I say discuss this seriously with your parents. Under normal conditions nikah is a sunnah, if however it is highly feared that a person may fall into sin (including oppressing oneself) then nikah becomes a fard obligation. Should your parents say to you to wait a few years then if it is in you to control yourself then obey them and fast and wait. If however even whilst fasting you still fall into or are strongly inclinde to sin then approach elders in your family or a respected alim to speak on your behalf to your parents.
I am sure ALLAH will open up a straight path for you.
A story. The ameer of a group I was with once told us that a Sahabi came to Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam and complained of poverty. He was commanded to do nikah. After a while the Sahabi came back and said I have married and am still in poverty. Again he was commanded to do nikah. The Sahabi came back a third and then fourth time with the same advice from Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam. When He returned after the fourth nikah he told Holy Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam that I a wealthy. The fourth noble wife started up a home business making baskets from reeds and plants and then the Sahabi would sell them in the market.
Subhanallah if we have true iman then making nikah will bring blessings and income into the household, it will not decrease in the household. Hence brother be strong and make intention for nikah. The pathways will open at their designated times inshaALLAH.
Getting married young
Sajid Iqbal β Sun, 11 Sep 2005 - 23:00
so you've joined the medieval way of thinking aswell...ah well.
if u dont agree with us, you are influenced by secularism!
Pagination