Asalamali'kum,
Many are confused to what should be done when...many have different ideologies, perspectives and priorities?
Should one marry as soon as they are mature, responsible, old enuf....or complete there education first (non-islamic education that is)?
Im asking in regards to women...bearing in mind it is probaly a litlle more difficult 4 them (no offence to the brothers inshllah)...but ofcourse u can also air ur views.
Whats your view?.. 
p.s anyone know how to read istikhara namaz (think thats how its spelt)?
its possible to be married and still in education
if your ready, responsible and up 4 it (also possibly support your partner), then why not i say?
some people also marry, cintinue with studies and then move in after degree
whats holding someone back who is able to marry and is currently studying? gimme an example....
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
i started a thread on Istaharaa not so long ago
do a search, i believe that should help
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
its a personal choice. there is nothing wrong with marrying young and when you are mature enough. but if you marry after you are educated you are set up for life, and have skills to help your family in the future.
both have benefits.
not necessarily true. education wont guarantee you stability, it may increase the chance.
marry when your ready, and put ur Faith in Allah SWT, for he can give u a secure future or do the opposite if he wills.
no harm in a lil struggle anyway
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
i personally think you can't do both, get married and go into further education. A friend of mine was planning to go uni and had applied through ucas. After her a level results she went pakistan and got married. She came back an was going to go uni the yr after but fell pregnant. Now it is almost impossible for her to go uni because she has the responsibility of a child as well as supporting her husband who has not completed his study and is doing his final yr here in England. I think its better to wait till your bit older and wiser and have experienced life.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
Salaam
I think marrying and pursuing higher education/working etc can be done..
It’s difficult to balance home responsibilities and education/work…but it’s not impossible.
My cousin who is only 2 years away from becoming a qualified doctor recently got married…her husband promised to support her all the way.
It all depends on what kind of person one gets married too.
Wasalaam
obviously its diff u have a child or two
you can be married with no kids and at uni
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
Another mate of mine is in full time education..she's doing her PGCE in Uni AND she has a three year old son...as well as being actively involved in Dawa'h work.
It can be done...it depends on how much a person can take on board....and the support they receive from their other half.
defo, i know ppl who had to drop out after marriage because they cud not cope with both. but my aunties friend continued education after marriage. she went back when her children were older, did social science, and is now a social worker.
anything is possible if you put yr mind to it. just pray that it is the best thing for you and the sky will be your limit.
yeah but most people have this mentality that it cant be done
btw naz, u say experience life...wat u mean by that?
the beloved prophet (SAW) said to marry young is to save half ur faith - and he encouraged it
i believe it can bring maturity and responsibilities to one
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
Like I said. It depends on the person.
Some people can hack it, some can't.
ANOTHER mate of mine spent two and a half years studying/working for Islam in Pakistan..with two kids under 3.
It was very hard..but she did it.
I for one, never intend to stop working/studying. I can't stand being idle or not doing anything useful..it makes me depressed.
my mum married young, it made her grow up very quickly.
her only regret was that she did not get to experience things in life she knew she would be difficult once married. she had to drop out of college- personal choice as she felt she could not do both at the time.
she does wish she continued with her education. but as said earlier, it has to be a personal choice. it may be difficult to pusrue both, but i think it is a lot easier to do that these days.
DATS A LOT OF IFS BRO.
Humko kiske gham ne mara ye kahani phir sahi
wen i say experience life i mean travel to new places, meet people, explore other cultures stuff like that. It broadens ones mind. If your married with kids it makes it a bit difficult to do that coz u got to put your family first. You got alot of responsibility. However there are people who are young and mature and if they can do both get married and go into education then good for you. But it just depends on the individual whether they can do both. I personally couldn't.
No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy
Humko kiske gham ne mara ye kahani phir sahi
the beloved prophet (SAW) said to marry young is to save half ur faith - and he encouraged it
i believe it can bring maturity and responsibilities to one[/quote]
BRO GETTIN MARRIED COMPLETES HALF OF UR IMAAN. i believe dat but come on, i agree wid NAZ, u got to experience life too.
Humko kiske gham ne mara ye kahani phir sahi
Humko kiske gham ne mara ye kahani phir sahi
hasnt this topic been discussed previously somewhere?
I think Muhtarama Yashmaki made some good posts in that topic.
I think marriage is gud as soon as possible. Personally I think im ready, i calculated and should be able to afford rent, food and bills so will marry soon inshaALLAH, if she'll have me, lol.
As for women, I would have thought it was easier for them? They dont have to pay for anything islamically, they can get married as soon as they attain maturity.
Ya ALLAH Madad.
Haq Chaar Yaar
As many ppl have said it realy depends on the individual, if you feel you are ready to get married and have found someone go for it, you can always work round it, it would also prove to be a challenge, which is good to get your brain workin a lil at times.
However if someone wants to finish education and feel they wont be able to cope with uni/marriage then they should finish it beforehand but thats not to say keep goin to uni till your 40! :shock:
how does one go about finding a partner once they think theyre ready?
and say your meeting someone in the presence of thier parents, say at thier house.......theyre bounda ask u questions.....wat do ya say?
The Lover is ever drunk with love;
He is free, he is mad,
He dances with ecstasy and delight.
Caught by our own thoughts,
We worry about every little thing,
But once we get drunk on that love,
Whatever will be, will be.
ɐɥɐɥ
maraige shouldnt put an end to stuff
people should be able to continue whatever they're into after marraige
Salam
A girl should marry well before her sell by date expires.
She should keep it in mind that this is one of the first thing which most men look at when making a decision whether or not to bring her home.
If you keep a man waiting, while you finish your "thing", then there is a risk that he may come across another girl who will sweep the bachelor off his feet. And so you may be left in the wind, chasing idiots that are practically useless for you.
Marriage is no joke. Its a life decision.
Omrow
LOL
and what is this "sell by date" for a woman?
Do tell.
Salam
Sell by date is a date beyond which things are marked as "half price".
Omrow
??
be more specific u fool
Salam
Do I really need to tell you the basics of productivity ?
Things go for cheap when they are past their sell by date.
Edible things go bad.
Omrow
Maybe sell-by-date is where the woman is willing to accept a lower standard of husband because she has started to become desperate.
I'm doing buisness in Uni
so I know these things
best time to get married is when a person is mentaly/physically mature
and at a age where education is completed and busy with career
to me that's 25
woman should never be desperate or ready to accept second best
Salam
So beautifully put. And so true of most women today.
Omrow
thats a load of bull
someone we know is almost 40
but still aint ready to accept any Tom, Dick and harry who wishes to marry her
its only the most important descsion a perosn makes in their life
I rather be single for the rest of my life then marry a dog who make my life hell
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