Your Funny and Crazy Conversations

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BD Brother wrote:
Ya'qub wrote:
I'm not gonna tell you his name, but just to confuse you guys more I'll tell you that he also shares his name with an African football player...

adebayor, muntari ? just a thought ...

Do you mean Adebayor, the famous crime-fighting detective?

There is only one footballer who's first name was a 1970s TV detective.

Come on guys, I'm rooting for you!

Don't just do something! Stand there.

Ya'qub wrote:

There is only one footballer who's first name was a 1970s TV detective.

Come on guys, I'm rooting for you!

My fun guess: Farrah (as in 1970s Charlies Angels Farrah Fawcett), Miss Marple or Starsky and Hutch (not exactly detectives but I dont care)

My more boring guess: Colombo, Poirot, Quincey ME, Kojak, Dalziel and Pascoe, the Rockford Files guy (watching UKTV Gold actually comes in handy for once!)

May Allah shine sweet faith upon you this day and times beyond. May your heart be enriched with peace, and may your home be blessed always. Ameen.

Amal wrote:
Ya'qub wrote:

There is only one footballer who's first name was a 1970s TV detective.

Come on guys, I'm rooting for you!

My fun guess: Farrah (as in 1970s Charlies Angels Farrah Fawcett) or Starsky and Hutch (not exactly detectives but I dont care)

My more boring guess: Colombo, Poirot, Quincey ME, Kojak, Dalziel and Pascoe, the Rockford Files guy (watching UKTV Gold actually comes in handy for once!)

Congratulations you finally got it (not saying which one though)!

Don't just do something! Stand there.

BD Brother wrote:
Owusu Abeyie .... ?

Yes, congratulations! An excellent team effort!

You now know they first name of one of my friends who once said something silly.

Give yourselves a collective pat on the back.

Don't just do something! Stand there.

love to live but living to die wrote:
Ya'qub wrote:
love to live but living to die wrote:
my friend's sister calls us : EYEtometrists.... lol ... (its suppose to be OPtometrist)

That's a great story, really it is.

wots dat suppose to mean?


Im sorry Ya'qub seems more ambiguous then he actually is, what he meant is that he thinks that your story is really good.

Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...

Friend1: Mufti Friend please tell me, is X allowed.
Friend2: There are two opinions..........
Friend1: What about Y?
Friend2: There are two opinions.......
Friend1: What about Z?
Friend2: There are two opinions.......
Friend1: What about the Oneness of Allah?
Friend2: There are two......... (looks embarrased)
Friend1: Astagfirullah! (Jokingly slaps him)

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

Seraphim wrote:
Crazy, insane conversations you've had.

EnglishFriend: do you sweat?
Me: erm, yeah...
Englishfriend: really?
me: yes i do
Englishfriend: huh, i thought asians didnt sweat...
me: :roll:

--------------------------------------------------------
Friend: OMG guess what!
Me: what?
Friend: I got 2 fit girls' numbers today
Me: :roll:
Friend: Seriously. They're from Brummie- in't that sick?
Me: No ... not really.
Friend: There all desi too. And muslim, in't that sick?
Me: I really dont wanna know.
Friend: Aw, you know you want some Wink Shall I fix you up?
Me: Do it and you'll die. Smile
Friend: Ooh, by the way, when's the next namaz. We'll read it together, ok?
Me: :?

-----------------------------------------------------------

GuyAtWork: So you must be the good muslim.
Me: What?
GuyAtWork: err... you know
Me: Nnoooo i dont know.
GuyAtWork: :shock:
Me: {raises eyebrow}
GuyAtWork: Never mind.... {walks off}

---------------------------------------------------------

[the time i was partially deaf... long story]

Manager: [we're locking up and about to switch the alarm on] Seraph get on the mat.
Me: Theres a Rat?? :shock:
Manager: No! the Mat [points to mat]!
Me: Where? I dont see no Rat?
Manager: MAT, MAT.... M....A....T.... MAT!
Me: [turns to co-worker] Should i know who Matt is?
Manager: :evil:
Me: [gulp- friend comes over and drags me over to the "mat"].

the last one....hahahahaha Smile

i would have never gone back to work after that! how embarrasing!

Stranger999 wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
Crazy, insane conversations you've had.

EnglishFriend: do you sweat?
Me: erm, yeah...
Englishfriend: really?
me: yes i do
Englishfriend: huh, i thought asians didnt sweat...
me: :roll:

--------------------------------------------------------
Friend: OMG guess what!
Me: what?
Friend: I got 2 fit girls' numbers today
Me: :roll:
Friend: Seriously. They're from Brummie- in't that sick?
Me: No ... not really.
Friend: There all desi too. And muslim, in't that sick?
Me: I really dont wanna know.
Friend: Aw, you know you want some Wink Shall I fix you up?
Me: Do it and you'll die. Smile
Friend: Ooh, by the way, when's the next namaz. We'll read it together, ok?
Me: :?

-----------------------------------------------------------

GuyAtWork: So you must be the good muslim.
Me: What?
GuyAtWork: err... you know
Me: Nnoooo i dont know.
GuyAtWork: :shock:
Me: {raises eyebrow}
GuyAtWork: Never mind.... {walks off}

---------------------------------------------------------

[the time i was partially deaf... long story]

Manager: [we're locking up and about to switch the alarm on] Seraph get on the mat.
Me: Theres a Rat?? :shock:
Manager: No! the Mat [points to mat]!
Me: Where? I dont see no Rat?
Manager: MAT, MAT.... M....A....T.... MAT!
Me: [turns to co-worker] Should i know who Matt is?
Manager: :evil:
Me: [gulp- friend comes over and drags me over to the "mat"].

the last one....hahahahaha Smile

i would have never gone back to work after that! how embarrasing!


What an idiot you wouldnt go back to work because of misunderstanding what your employer said?

Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...

love to live but living to die wrote:
Funzo wrote:
love to live but living to die wrote:
Ya'qub wrote:
love to live but living to die wrote:
my friend's sister calls us : EYEtometrists.... lol ... (its suppose to be OPtometrist)

That's a great story, really it is.

wots dat suppose to mean?


Im sorry Ya'qub seems more ambiguous then he actually is, what he meant is that he thinks that your story is really good.

naaah i still don't get it! ... wot story r u on abt? i wrote no story!

Look at what the thread is titled as then read what other ppl have put then read what you have put. Smile

No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy

Funzo - can you not call anyone an idiot. Thanks.

What about people who truly are idiots?

Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...

Funzo wrote:
What about people who truly are idiots?

We call them Funzo!

Don't just do something! Stand there.

OK Yaqub, I think he get's the picture.

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

What picture? i didnt recieve, should have used parcel force

Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...

This happened around the time when the new Renault Megane advert came out. You know the one where theres that song 'i see you baby... shaking that...' you know.

I was in picadilly gardens with a friend, we were walking and I had that song stuck in my head:

Seraph: hmm mmmm (starts singing) I see you baby ... shaking that a$$... shaking that a$$. {I didnt realise the women infront of us were listening... suddenly the STOP AND TURN AROUND TO LOOK AT US}
MyFriend: Fool
Seraph: {Points to my friend} :arrow:
MyFriend: :shock:

Back in BLACK

Seraphim wrote:
This happened around the time when the new Renault Megane advert came out. You know the one where theres that song 'i see you baby... shaking that...' you know.

I was in picadilly gardens with a friend, we were walking and I had that song stuck in my head:

Seraph: hmm mmmm (starts singing) I see you baby ... shaking that a$$... shaking that a$$. {I didnt realise the women infront of us were listening... suddenly the STOP AND TURN AROUND TO LOOK AT US}
MyFriend: Fool
Seraph: {Points to my friend} :arrow:
MyFriend: :shock:

You're cruel man!
You know when you go up to someone thinking that you know them, you say hi and then you realise that they're someone totally different!

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

Courage wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
This happened around the time when the new Renault Megane advert came out. You know the one where theres that song 'i see you baby... shaking that...' you know.

I was in picadilly gardens with a friend, we were walking and I had that song stuck in my head:

Seraph: hmm mmmm (starts singing) I see you baby ... shaking that a$$... shaking that a$$. {I didnt realise the women infront of us were listening... suddenly the STOP AND TURN AROUND TO LOOK AT US}
MyFriend: Fool
Seraph: {Points to my friend} :arrow:
MyFriend: :shock:

You're cruel man!
You know when you go up to someone thinking that you know them, you say hi and then you realise that they're someone totally different!

lol it was funny at the time, they were giving him bare dirty looks.
Ive never mistaken some1 for some1 else, but I do tend to get approached by people who "appear" to know me from somewhere. They're like "Hey, i know you.. we went to such a such a place. Do you remember me?" im like ... "erm no?" Im terrible like that. If i havent spoken to you before i wont bother remembering your face.

Back in BLACK

Courage wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
This happened around the time when the new Renault Megane advert came out. You know the one where theres that song 'i see you baby... shaking that...' you know.

I was in picadilly gardens with a friend, we were walking and I had that song stuck in my head:

Seraph: hmm mmmm (starts singing) I see you baby ... shaking that a$$... shaking that a$$. {I didnt realise the women infront of us were listening... suddenly the STOP AND TURN AROUND TO LOOK AT US}
MyFriend: Fool
Seraph: {Points to my friend} :arrow:
MyFriend: :shock:

You're cruel man!
You know when you go up to someone thinking that you know them, you say hi and then you realise that they're someone totally different!


No your just daft.

Those who danced were thought to be quite insane, by those who couldn't hear the music...

Seraphim wrote:
This happened around the time when the new Renault Megane advert came out. You know the one where theres that song 'i see you baby... shaking that...' you know.

I was in picadilly gardens with a friend, we were walking and I had that song stuck in my head:

Seraph: hmm mmmm (starts singing) I see you baby ... shaking that a$$... shaking that a$$. {I didnt realise the women infront of us were listening... suddenly the STOP AND TURN AROUND TO LOOK AT US}
MyFriend: Fool
Seraph: {Points to my friend} :arrow:
MyFriend: :shock:

lol

That reminds me i was at work the other day and i have a habit to whistling along to the songs. My mum is always telling me off for whistling now i know why. Anyway here i was whistling along to the song and as i turned the corner some Asian guy was stood there. He started smiling (he probs thought i was whistling at him but i wasnt). I just shut up, put my head down and started walking really fast. :oops:

No not the gum drop buttons! – Gingy

Funzo wrote:
Courage wrote:
Seraphim wrote:
This happened around the time when the new Renault Megane advert came out. You know the one where theres that song 'i see you baby... shaking that...' you know.

I was in picadilly gardens with a friend, we were walking and I had that song stuck in my head:

Seraph: hmm mmmm (starts singing) I see you baby ... shaking that a$$... shaking that a$$. {I didnt realise the women infront of us were listening... suddenly the STOP AND TURN AROUND TO LOOK AT US}
MyFriend: Fool
Seraph: {Points to my friend} :arrow:
MyFriend: :shock:

You're cruel man!
You know when you go up to someone thinking that you know them, you say hi and then you realise that they're someone totally different!


No your just daft.

Don't be sad, Funzo.

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

Deception, man! How did the friedn get hold of it? Weren't you like stood over it?

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

MyDad: So you're going to Manchester? At this time?
Me: Yes.
MyDad: Arent you going to read Juma?
Me: Ill read there. Im killing two stones with one bird.
MyDad: :doubt:
Me: (realises what ive just said... but pretends to have done so on purpose).

Back in BLACK

We went to Turkey a couple of years back, and everytime i salamed people they kept saying "you Muslim?" I just didn't get it, i was covered up head2toe!! :?

Me: Assalamu'alikum,
Man: You Muslim?
Me: Alhumdulillah
Man: You Muslim,
Me: Yes, yes Alhumdulillah i'm Muslim.
Man: But you brown?
Me: Yes, im Muslim,my parents are from Bangladesh.
Man: Bengladesh? No no, Pekistan yes.
Me: No,no,i am Muslim, my parents are originally from Bangladesh and i'm from Manchester.
Man: Oh, you from London!
Me: :roll:

I'm sat in work canteen having me dinner when suddenly a woman comes up to me.

Woman : starts to stroke my arm and says "hi are you ok?"

Me: :? (why is she asking me if im ok. Maybe she just being polite. Why the hell she stroking me arm for. Maybe shes a..... naa i doubt it, she dont look like one but she is awfully close to my face. Naz snap out of it, now is not the time for deep contemplation. Answer woman answer!

Me: "Im fine thanks"

Woman:" Do you remember me?"

Me: :? :? (stares at her face for a while) "erm no"

Woman: "remember you and your mum came"

Me: (mum was here the night with sis maybe she getting me confused with her but she looks nothing like me) "no"

Woman: "Are you from the Shaw branch?"

Me: "No"

Woman: starts to laugh. "You look just like her". Walks away laughing.

Me: :? :? :?

Did you tell her to explain herself?

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

i'm at the airport in saudi arabia wiTH my brother, a saudi man comes up.

man: salamu alaikum
my brother: walaikum asalam
man: where did you come from?
my brother: england
man: when did you convert to islam?
my brother: (lying) last year
man: mashalah

lol

saudi arabian people think that everyone who lives in england is actually english, and not even think about how my brother knows arabic properly

"to allah we belong and to him we return"

I was in Muscat,Oman:

Security: (pointing to my jeans) Are you wearing a belt?
Me: No
Security: (points to where my belt should be) What's this then?
Me: (Gives him a strange look)
Security: OK don't worry?

Chin up, mate! Life's too short.

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